Enigma
by Skull Bearer
Summary: What if Raistlin and Dalamar had met before Legends? A long time before? Response to the Leo Zodiac challenge. A realistic RaistlinDalamar slash story set during the Soulforge. First in 'Ivory and Ebony' series. NOW REWRITTEN!
1. Curiosity

_Okay, so I know I should be concentrating on my current instalments, but to be honest, I've been longing to re-write this for ages. It's got a ton of spelling mistakes, it's pretty bare-bones, the romance moves too fast and Dalamar's 'voice' is completely different to how he speaks in later instalments. The story's been kept the same (this being one of the few things I actually /liked/ about the original), but I've changed and added a lot of things._

_I'm also planning to re-do Ice and Steel, but that will take a while since that will be mostly adding extra chapters._

_Notes: An answer to the "Zodiac" challenge: LEO AUGUST Passionate, forceful, aggressive, likes to be in the lime light. 1) The "Different Meeting" Challenge: Make your characters meet for the first time in a different way than they do in "canon", but still be who they are.  
Disclaimer and warnings:  
AU, obviously (Dalamar was discovered and kicked out of Silvanesti much earlier). Slash, obviously. Raistlin/Dalamar, obviously. Not mine; although the plot is, obviously. The lyrics belong to Kovenant who are in my mind one of the best bands currently in existence and a good deal of this fic was written while listening to them._

_Long A/N:  
This takes place two years before Raistlin takes his test. Here Raistlin is nineteen, has auburn hair, uncursed blue eyes and while he is quite sickly, doesn't suffer from his cough yet. If you think that Raistlin is behaving like he's far older than nineteen, please remember who we're taking about, also remember that he's nowhere near as good with the magic yet, so he and Dalamar are on pretty much the same level. Dalamar used the spell 'Shirak' due to the fact that it is a spell and not just a command word for the staff of Magius. This focuses on the mental aspects of Raistlin and Dalamar's relationship, is as realistic as I can be, and as they are both pretty messed up individuals... is not normal by miles._

**Enigma**

Chapter one- Curiosity

_"We were alone and on our own, in the dark between the stars.  
From the shadows to the pyre, amidst the chaos, from the stars"  
-Star by Star, Kovenant_

Raistlin sighed as he walked down the long road leading from the outskirts of Qualinesti to Solace, a road few travelled on and which was very overgrown.

He hadn't exactly been pleased when Master Theobald had demanded that he go to the edges of the elven lands- a journey of nearly two weeks- and offer to trade with the elves for herbs that Theobald insisted were "vital spell components."

The young mage knew very well why he'd been chosen for the task. He was the oldest in Theobald's class and the only one with any knowledge of herb lore (including 'Master' Theobald). He'd held his own in the argument for about five minutes until his 'Master' started making noises suggesting expulsion if he didn't obey. He had probably been bluffing, but even if he had, Raistlin didn't want to take the risk.

Never mind that it had been drizzling for nearly the entire week -probably the reason Theobald hadn't gone himself- or the fact that the schoolmaster had no idea if the elves would barter or not. In fact, Raistlin suspected that Theobald's true reason for setting him on this fool's errand was to get him out of his hair for a month.

To make things worse, Caramon- Raistlin's twin and the one who would have normally accompanied him on such a trip- was unable to come due to having sprained his leg a few days before. The clumsy oaf had slipped off a plank walkway made treacherous by the constant downpour and hit another bridge walk several meters down. Although he hadn't broken any bones, he'd sprained his leg badly (to say nothing of the mass of bruises carpeting his ribs) to the point that he hadn't even been able to rise from the bed and see Raistlin off, let alone accompany him.

Despite his brother's protests, Raistlin had gone alone, not that he'd had much choice in the matter. Flint, Tanis, and the kender had left on a short trip east to trade with the Plainsmen and wouldn't be for at least another three weeks, and Kitiara had pulled off one of her disappearing acts so Gods only knew when _she'd_ be back.

Raistlin had been fortunate enough to meet a trader going part of the way to Qualinesti and had negotiated a ride on his wagon. However, luck seemed to have abandoned him after that. Not only had the elves flat-out refused to barter or even let him anywhere near their woods, but the return journey appeared to be one which he would have to make alone on foot.

So now Raistlin found himself a week's journey from Solace, without the herbs which had been the entire point of the journey, during a particularly wet and miserable spring. It was raining now, and Raistlin was soaked through and shivering as he trudged down the path back to Solace, a path which more closely resembled as a river of mud between two grassy banks. It sucked at his boots as he walked along, and the rain drenched him and made his robes stick unpleasantly to his skin.

The only mercy was that the road was very rarely travelled. The elves hardly ever let anyone in and the dwarves in the city of Thorbardin kept their gates firmly closed, so any bandits in the area tended to leave this stretch of road alone in favour of more travelled areas. Raistlin snorted, he wished there had been bandits on this road, if so, then he would have been given a better reason to refuse Theobald's 'request'. So instead of risking a quick death on a thief's blade, he was doomed to a much slower one from hypothermia. How typical.

The rain stopped briefly around midday, giving Raistlin a chance to examine the map Theobald had given him without fear that it would disintegrate. The map was rough at best, and the damp and mud hadn't improved it. The road was little more than a thin, wavering line next to large smudges which Raistlin supposed were meant to represent mountains. He'd toyed with the idea of crossing the mountains themselves, but between his own ignorance of the region and the bad quality of the map, he'd probably end up halfway to Neraka.

As if on cue, the rain started again. Raistlin sighed, rolled up the map, and drew his already soaking hood further over his head and shoved the map back into a pocket.

The day promised to be pretty much what the others had been, both the journey there, and the journey back, wet, foggy and unpleasant. Shivering a little from the cold wind, Raistlin began to walk again. The rain, which had started as a light drizzle, quickly grew stronger, pelting down from an iron-grey sky. Before long Raistlin had trouble seeing more than ten feet ahead, and was as sodden as if he'd jumped into Crystalmir lake with his clothes on. He thought about taking shelter under one the trees which now crowded close to the overgrown path, but decided against it. The trees were bent over, their early leaves limp in the downpour and dripping rainwater sullenly onto the already muddy path. The wind made their branches creak and Raistlin didn't particularly want to be under them when one snapped.

Shivering harder, clasping his cloak around him in a futile attempt to keep warm, Raistlin kept going. Walking as he was, head down against the driving rain, it wasn't surprising that he didn't see the other traveller until they had almost collided. He pulled up short, suddenly noticing the figure in front of him, no more than a few feet away. The man turned, also seeing he was no longer alone on the road.

"If you've come to rob me," The voice was hoarse, and strangely accented, "I can inform you I have nothing of value."

Raistlin tried to make out the figure, it appeared to be a slender man a little taller than he was, wearing a very bedraggled black cloak.

Taking Raistlin's silence to mean that either he wasn't a bandit, or that he would leave him alone, the stranger turned and began to walk again. The mage fell into step behind the newcomer, studying him.

Whoever the man could be, he was not rich, no bandit would bother him. His cloak was worn thin and stained with long travel and he wore no backpack where weapons or steel might be stowed. With no weapons, armor or cohorts, whoever this was, they were unlikely to be any kind of a threat.

The two of them travelled in silence as the day wore on. When night started to fall, the stranger turned to Raistlin. "As we're both travelling the same way, would you join me in finding somewhere to rest for the night?"

Raistlin thought it over. If this person was a brigand, they would have had plenty of opportunities to rob him prior to this. Besides, two pairs of eyes were better than none when it came to finding shelter. He nodded once and gestured towards the mountains to the east of them. His fellow traveller inclined his head in agreement and walked off the path towards the jagged teeth of the peaks half a mile away. Raistlin followed him. The land was rough, and dotted with caves worn from the frequent snows and spring melts, Raistlin had found himself using them several times as shelter when the weather was simply too wet to sleep outdoors.

Unfortunately, they hadn't been the only one to think of this. No sooner had they found a likely cave that a large black bear lumbered out of the shadows, thin from long hibernation and growling ferociously.  
Raistlin jumped back out of the cave, his heart pounding, and one hand reaching to his pouches for spell components. He didn't have the chance to draw up a spell, however, before the stranger leaped to the side and thrust one clenched hand into the air- _"Shirak!"_

Blinding light filled the cave, and the bear- unused to it after its long sleep- roared in pain and fled, lunging past Raistlin to disappear down the mountainside.

Raistlin stared at the stranger, his face betraying a fraction of the shock he felt.  
"You are magi." He said, his first words since he'd met the man, not accusing or amazed, just stating the truth.

"Yes." Soft irony, irony remarkably similar to that Raistlin often heard in his own voice, bit into the single word. "The same as you." Unseen eyes stared, undaunted, from beneath the drawn hood.

Raistlin looked back, equally undaunted, he nodded slightly. "Yes."

The words between them stopped, but the look lingered, not hostile, not challenging, but searching, curious, as probing as their words were guarded.

They found enough dry wood in the cave to make a fire, both for warmth and to deter the bear if it returned. Once sitting beside the blaze, pack laid down and component pouches discarded, Raistlin found himself unwilling to remove his hood and cloak. So far neither of them had seen each other's faces, the low light and heavy hoods had seen to that, but despite the damp material weighing heavily on his back, he felt reluctant to remove it, to open himself to the stranger's probing eyes.

The stranger's thoughts appeared to be running along the same lines, and the two of them sat, still hooded, staring at each other over the crackling flames as intensely as if the other was an enigma they were dying to solve.

Finally, it was the stranger who straightened and unbuckled his cloak, pulling it over his shoulders, over his head, to lay it down nearby to dry.  
Then he straightened up and met Raistlin's gaze squarely, challenging.

Raistlin had to fight back the urge to blink in surprise. The man was, for one thing, not a man at all; the slanted eyes and pointed ears gave that away instantly. Yet the robes he wore under his cloak, though travel-stained and worn, were not the typical white of a follower of Solinari.

They were black, black as night, black as the invisible moon.

Dark elf.

Raistlin raised his eyes back to the elf's face, his grey eyes were slightly narrowed, black eyebrows arching over them in the hint of a frown, thin lips lightly compressed- still appearing calm, but allowing an aura of menace to show through. This elf, like Raistlin, was adept at controlling his emotions, he was sure that the Dark elf's face showed only what he wanted Raistlin to see.

The elf jerked his head slightly, and Raistlin pulled his own cloak off his shoulders, copying the elf in laying it down to dry before raising his eyes to meet the Dark elf's.  
His turn to challenge.

Their eyes locked and Raistlin could see himself in the elf's eyes: nineteen, old beyond his years, thin and as pale in the firelight as the robes that marked his allegiance. He wondered what the Dark elf saw, reflected in Raistlin's fire splashed blue eyes.

The tension stretched. "Solinari." The Dark elf said, voice forcibly impassive, gesturing at Raistlin's robes.

"I have not been Tested." Raistlin answered the elf's unspoken question.

The tension in the air lessened as if it had been cut. The elf shook his head "Neither have I."

It was strange, Raistlin mused, still staring intently at his companion, despite the few words they had exchanged, he already had a healthy respect from the Dark elf, one had somehow knew was returned. It was the first time he had met someone so hard to read. His emotions were as guarded as if a sheet of steel had been placed in front of them.

The silence stretched as they prepared to eat. He'd had had to bring some provisions for the journey due to the lack of game in bad weather, but the majority he found along the way. He'd pulled out some dried fruit and a few mushrooms he'd found the day before. Due to his usual lack of appetite, this would be more than enough.  
His companion had pulled a small sack from out of one of his cloak pockets, a sack holding some unidentifiable dried meat and hard bread. Human trail rations, Raistlin thought; clearly the elf had been exiled for quite some time. Interesting.

Most Dark elves, he knew, did not live long after being thrown out. He'd heard from Tanis that elves considered death more humane than exile, even despite their respect for life. Of those few that were forced to leave their homelands; most died, either by the hand of the righteous or by their own. This one clearly had the strength to live on after exile, and the cunning to avoid those who would have him dead.

Also, if he had been on the road for a while, it was highly unlikely he had come from nearby Qualinesti. Silvanesti then, and not one so high and mighty that he looked down on sharing a cave with a human. Still, it was odd that he should be so close to elven lands.

"What were you doing near Qualinesti?" Raistlin asked, voice betraying nothing but casual nonchalance, asking the question would give him a better insight on his companion, the questions he couldn't answer for himself.

"I came from further south, from Tarsis." The Dark elf answered, and Raistlin picked up the smallest strain when the elf spoke the name of the city- not something anyone else would have picked up, but intriguing all the same. The Dark elf seemed to have realised his slip, and was watching Raistlin intently as he continued, "I cut through the mountains rather than follow the woods."

No prizes for guessing why Raistlin mused. He had heard from Tanis the penalties for a Dark elf attempting to return to or even go near elven lands. Clearly even the elven love for life had limits.  
"And you are heading where?" Raistlin asked, tone neutral.

"North."

Just that. North. No sign of duplicity or any sign of hiding anything. No doubt the elf was heading north for no other reason than lack of any other direction, all held nothing.

"And you, mage," the Dark elf asked, "Where are you headed?" Voice bland, he was very good.

"Solace." Don't give anything away that he hasn't done first.

The silence between them was broken, visual probing discarded in favour of this elaborate, verbal chess game. Each of them moving to draw the other out without revealing too much about themselves. Each curiously probing.

By the end of the conversation, if it could be called that, Raistlin had learnt that his companion was, as he'd guessed, from Silvanesti, and travelling from place to place in the hopes of developing his skill with the magic to the point where he could take the Test in the Tower of High Sorcery. He was eighty-five and had been in exile for about two years. He had also lived in Tarsis for most of this time, Raistlin guessed, although the elf had said nothing directly.

As in all chess games, verbal as well as physical, pieces must be sacrificed to draw out the opponent. The Dark elf now knew that Raistlin was nineteen, attended Theobald's school of magic in Solace and most likely lived there as well, he was well skilled in herb lore, and had a twin brother.

The Dark elf looked up from where he had been examining his hands. "This has been very interesting conversation"- Raistlin could sense the smile in the Silvanesti's words, although his face remained expressionless- "would you care to continue it tomorrow on the road?"

Raistlin nodded, and allowed his smile to reach his lips, "Yes, I think that would be a good idea."  
Another chance to sake the curiosity the Dark Elf had awakened in him, for one so used to reading people, his companion represent to Raistlin a challenge undreamt of.

The two of them sat in the silence that had descended, contemplating this information, then the Dark elf stood and walked to the cavern entrance, looking out.

The rain had stopped some hours ago and finally appeared to be moving west towards Qualinesti and the sea. Sky and stars glinted through breaks in the clouds for the first time in days. It seemed as though they might have some decent weather for once.

Without turning, the Dark elf asked the one question neither of them had seen fit to ask before. The one that would tell him little of his companion, nothing about his past, and yet was often the first thing asked in conversations.

"What is your name, mage?"

"Raistlin Majere."

"Majere..." The Dark elf tasted the word thoughtfully. "Hmm..." he paused, and studied Raistlin again. Then- "My name is Dalamar Nightson."

Nightson? A curious name for an elf. A lie perhaps? But no, in this chess game they both gave what they took, they told the other exactly what the other had told them, no more, no less. A changed name then, taken when his real one was stricken from elven record. In a corrupted form of elven, that of the wilder elves, Nightson meant Argent, a far more fitting name for a Silvanesti, meaning 'silver' in their language.

And his first name, Dalamar...told nothing, a Silvanesti name, nothing more. Yes, his companion told the truth, and then there was still tomorrow to solve this tantalizing puzzle, this riddle that the Dark elf posed.

Raistlin pulled out the battered spellbook he owned, and began to memorize his few spells for the next day. He felt Dalamar's eyes on him as he did so, before the elf turn his attention to his own spells.

_Skull Bearer_


	2. Fascination

**Enigma**

Chapter two- Fascination

_"Love, life and liberty, Hate, death and captivity  
Like a stain of starless darkness, across the canvas of space"  
-Star by Star, Kovenant_

The next morning heralded the end of the bad weather which had plagued the area for the past few weeks, although a few clouds still hung menacingly over the western horizon, the strong easterly wind promised to disperse them before noon. If the weather continued to improve and after enjoying a warm fire last night, Raistlin hoped he'd escape catching anything worse than a cold.

The early dawn light found both Raistlin and Dalamar back on the road, having both awoken before it was light and clambered down the mountainside in the dark to reach the rough road north.

The first hour they walked in silence, a silence in which the two could all but hear the other thinking.

Why, Raistlin pondered, did he find the elf so fascinating? What so drew him? Was it the challenge? Was it that he was so used to being able to read someone's thoughts, that being blocked so completely fascinated him? Was it curiosity, to see what was hidden behind those grey eyes and that not-smile? Was it respect, to have found someone who matched him equally in the game of manipulation, both of self and others?

If not these, then what?

"Who do you follow?" The Dark elf's voice cracked into Raistlin's thoughts like a whip. His head jerked up, but recovered fast. In Dalamar's eyes he saw that no motion or expression had been missed.

"In what context?" Raistlin asked carefully.

"You wear white robes, but since you haven't taken the Test, that tells me nothing but that your sponsor follows Solinari, who do you follow?" The Dark elf cocked his head and stared pensively at Raistlin.

Raistlin hesitated, surprised at the directness of the query. He had sworn never to deny the Gods of magic and answering evasively would be betraying this oath.

"All."

"All?" Dalamar seemed slightly taken aback by this equally direct answer.

"I follow magic above all, and nothing else." He stared hard, aware how amusing he might look to another, nineteen yet swearing undying loyalty to the magic! If Dalamar found the image amusing, however, he said nothing and kept his face as blank as ever.

"Do you not find that one of the Gods of magic echo your beliefs more than the others?" There was a touch of incredulity as he pressed the point.

"If any, then Lunitari. What of you, _Dark elf_" - here Raistlin put slight emphasis on the words and studied Dalamar's reaction- "Do you follow Nuitari? Or perhaps the Dark Queen?"

He thought he saw the slightest edge of pain in Dalamar's eyes at the title, then it was gone and the elf straightened proudly, "I follow Nuitari, but the way you speak of the old Gods... as if you believe in them." Dalamar glanced slyly sideways at Raistlin.

Again, Raistlin's oath bound him against being vague. "I swore myself to the Gods of magic, I do not believe, I know."

The was no mockery in Dalamar's eyes then, only great surprise and slight pleasure; before he regained control and became once again impassive.

Then; "I swore myself too- to Nuitari- in return for the magic. But why did you?"

Raistlin set his face as blankly incredulous. "For the magic, of course, what else could be worth the risks?"

"Or the rewards." Dalamar added smirking slightly. Raistlin smiled, finding, to his surprise, a feeling of kinship with the Dark elf, kinship unlike any he had ever felt. Still, perhaps not so surprising.

They walked on in silence for a while, thinking. To Raistlin, this discussion had revealed more fascinating, tantalizing questions than answers. Dalamar was devoted to the magic, as devoted as Raistlin? Perhaps. It occurred to Raistlin that he had never considered that his companion may have been lying, but he did not consider it now. What would the elf stand to gain by lying to him?

Yet the elf had told him he had pledged, like Raistlin had, to the Gods of magic, or rather, to one God, why? Did Solinari not echo his beliefs, or did he have no choice in the matter? He was devoted to the magic, yes, but why? Did he love the magic? Was he, like Raistlin, nothing without it? Or was it the only thing he had left after being exiled?

He had spoken of the rewards of magic? Were they the same rewards that Raistlin knew, or different?

Webs within webs, and far too fascinating to leave alone.

Dalamar turned, as if he had heard Raistlin's thoughts, but said nothing, giving only a grey eyed not-smile which had nothing to do with joy, but all to do with challenge.

_Come and find out,_ it seemed to taunt.

"Who sponsors you?" Dalamar asked. The elf's voice was soft, in direct contrast with the last time the silence had been broken.

"A mage named Antimodes." Raistlin answered, wondering where this conversation would take them.

"I've heard of him," Dalamar said thoughtfully, "he travels a lot, by what I've heard, goes all over Ansalon."

Raistlin shrugged slightly, "I've only met him a few times, and then that was a long time ago. You have no sponsor, I take it?"

Dalamar gave another bittersweet not-smile and shook his head. "I never have, I was never allowed to study the magic."

"Really?" Raistlin was quick to pounce on that slip of the tongue, "Why not? I thought elves welcomed magic users in their ranks."

The Dark elf's expression became wry, he'd clearly not meant to say that much. "Not from their servants."

"Serv- Ah, house Servitor." He had heard that much from Tanis, but still... It surprised him that even the Silvanesti would have turned away someone as obviously dedicated as Dalamar.

"You know a lot about elves, Raistlin Majere, where from?"

Raistlin smiled darkly back, another pawn sacrificed to draw out the opponent...

"I have an...acquaintance familiar in the ways of elves, he told me much." He wouldn't exactly call Tanis a friend.

"Hmm." Dalamar seemed lost in thought for a while, then- "You live in... Solace, I believe?"

"The school of magic is there." Raistlin spoke evasively.

"But you lived there before then, yes? You said you had a brother there."

"Yes." Another pawn lost, another advantage, no matter how small, relinquished...

"Is it a large town? To have a school of magic in it?"

Raistlin shook his head, "No, not really." Then, at the elf's politely incredulous look, he added wryly "I expect the Conclave set the school there in order to keep its master as far away from them as possible."

To Raistlin's surprise, Dalamar laughed, a soft, oddly lilting sound. "And do you agree with that opinion?"

The human mage scowled at the now distant rain clouds, hoping they would soon empty their burden on Theobald's empty head, "If I didn't then, I do now."

Again, Dalamar laughed.

* * *

Raistlin had tried to keep going for as long as possible, but he had to stop. He'd been forced to slow his pace a while back as a stitch started in his side and now had to step over to the edge of the road and sit down and wait for the cramp to pass. It hurt more than Raistlin wanted to admit, and he leant over in an attempt to ease it. Dalamar walked on a few steps before realizing that his companion was no longer with him. Turning, he looked back at Raistlin, "Is something the matter?" 

Raistlin shook his head, trying to hide his self-disgust and for once, failing. The elf walked back and sat back on his haunches, level to Raistlin, looking with curiosity, though not pity. Eyes taking in his exhausted state, his thin build and the bones which showed prominently in his hands and face.

Then he sat down beside Raistlin, face blank and eyes...that was one emotion Raistlin could not name, not pity or kindness or any other such, but similar... understanding, somehow.

Then Dalamar's eyes too became expressionless. "Are you ill?" Voice as blank as his face.

Raistlin sighed, "No." He said flatly. He was tired and his side ached and he was not about to give any more than was necessary.

Again, he felt the elf stare at him, and that strange not-smile flickered on his face again. "Just not particularly strong?" Dalamar raised an eyebrow.

An understatement if there ever was one. Annoyed at having to admit weakness, Raistlin nodded, bitterly looking over his companion in turn. Although the Dark elf was thin, it was one that spoke of not having enough to eat rather than the ill-health Raistlin suffered from. His strong frame proved that he had once been well-built and would be again once he got a few decent meals. He was a good deal taller than most of his race, matching a human in height.

It was the first time Raistlin had really paid attention to Dalamar's appearance, and in comparison to his own, he knew he fell short. The elf, with his jet black hair, sharp featured face and silvery grey eyes was physically very attractive. Impatiently, Raistlin pushed the thought out of his mind, and forced himself to his feet. The pain had passed enough for him to keep going, and he didn't want to stay and dwell any longer than necessary.

He knew he'd given the Dark elf yet more information, and Dalamar had probably been able to read the thoughts he had been too preoccupied to guard, yet somehow that didn't seem to matter. Fascination kept him playing this bizarre verbal game with his companion, giving as well as taking, drawing on just as he was drawn on with titbits of knowledge.

Midday came and again they stopped, this time to eat. Raistlin was the one to break the silence this time, as he dug through he spell pouch, finding to his disgust that the leather had been soaked through by the rain, and the components ruined. "I have to find some more components for my spells, these have spoilt." He paused, "Will you come with me?"

Dalamar nodded, "I'm running low on them myself, and I haven't much food left."

Raistlin wondered why he had asked the elf to follow him, most likely for the same reason he would have followed Dalamar; spending more time with the elf in the hopes of puzzling out the enigma he posed.

It would have taken them less than a few minutes to gather what they wanted normally, the components Raistlin wanted were easy enough to find and the wet weather meant that there were mushrooms under almost every tree, but they both kept stopping and looking, intently, at the other as they searched. The fascination was maddening, Raistlin thought, watching the Dark elf. To both wish to know the other and to wish not to know and prolong the dance for as long as possible.

"What is it?" Dalamar had caught Raistlin staring at him, the human let a smile twist his thin lips.

"You are one to talk." He snorted, "You have been watching me just as much."

"Then answer for both of us, why?"

"You know the answer."

"So I do, but neither of us has said it."

For a moment, Raistlin was hit with a strong feeling of doubt, an emotion so long absent from his life that the shock of it almost crippled his thoughts. What if he was wrong, and he was the only one so curious about the other? The sheer strength of the emotion eclipsed everything, and Raistlin hesitated, emotion showing through for a split second before he quashed the fear ruthlessly.

A split second, but not one which was missed, Raistlin was certain of that.

"You are fascinating."

"So I am. No need to worry, you fascinate me equally. I have never met one so taken by the magic as you are, save myself -"

"And I have never met one who could hide his mind so well, save in a mirror." Raistlin finished, crushing his relief before it could manifest as anything but a slight emotion on the edge of his mind.

The feeling of release, however, was harder to hide for both of them, and the sudden tension was dispelled once again. Dalamar inclined his head.

"Well, this _is _an interesting game we're playing." The Dark elf smiled, a true smile rather than the smirks and non-smiles Raistlin had previously seen, one than made his face even more striking- and made Raistlin's heart jump. "I hope you're as worthy as I hope I will be."

They took to the road once more, having refilled their packs and spell pouches. Somehow, the fact that they had spoken of their mutual fascination had only intensified the emotion.

Dalamar interlaced his fingers thoughtfully, gazing at Raistlin, "At what point did you start learning the magic? You're young, and at the same time I'd wager you have more than one spell in that book of yours."

Raistlin shrugged, "Young. I was six when I started at the mage school, thirteen when I pledged myself to the magic, and sixteen when I cast my first spell. I'm nineteen now." He gave Dalamar a sly glance, "And you?"

This, Raistlin knew, was as much a part of their verbal games as their probing questions, the questions gave them knowledge of the other's past, this gave them knowledge of what the other was like, how they spoke, how they interacted with others as well as some idea of their likes and dislikes.

The Dark elf inclined his head with a smile- another true smile, Raistlin noted; and again, the expression evoked some rather puzzling reactions in Raistlin himself. Obviously Dalamar enjoyed talking about the magic as much as Raistlin did, because his words held a slight inflection of emotion that he hadn't been able to suppress. "I never had the chance to go to a mage school, mostly I was given scraps of knowledge in the hopes that I would be content with that and not look for that knowledge in... other places." Dalamar gestured at his robe, and his smile faded to the pale mockery of the one Raistlin had just seen. "As you can see, that failed magnificently."

The smile returned, though thinner, "I was eighty three when I pledged myself to Nuitari, but I knew how to cast spells long before that."

Raistlin frowned slightly, if Dalamar had sworn loyalty to Nuitari two years ago, it would be the same year he was exiled, "Was that why they exiled you? Because you swore loyalty to Nuitari?"

Dalamar's expression, which had been more open than it had been since Raistlin had met him, slammed closed. However ready the elf had been to discuss the magic, talking about his more recent past was out of bounds.

Raistlin watched him, wondering what it felt like to be exiled. To be subjected to something your people considered to be a fate worse than death. He recalled how Tanis, only a Half-elf, would so often return to Qualinesti, even though he always left swearing never to go back there. No wonder Dalamar didn't want to talk about it. Quite beyond the game they were playing, this was too painful to discuss. With a sigh, Raistlin changed the subject, "And after that, you said you stayed in Tarsis?"

Again silence, and although Raistlin saw a muscle in the elf's jaw twitch, he couldn't fathom the reaction. It didn't seem as though Dalamar was keeping quiet in order to string him along, and although his refusal to talk about his exile would act as a cover, it did seem that whatever happened after his exile wasn't something he wanted to speak of either.

No, this silence would not be related to their little contest. Remembering how Dalamar had spoken of the magic, he could see that the Dark elf was not as hostile or unfriendly as he seemed, he was reserved, quietly determined and coldly confident- both of himself and his abilities- yet not to the point of the arrogance that was so common with his race, otherwise Raistlin doubted the elf would have conceded to talk to him to begin with. He saw Raistlin for what he was- an equal- and knew himself very well, knew what he could do and what he couldn't.

Much like Raistlin did.

Yet, push the elf another way, and he would snap shut and refuse to speak. Raistlin could understand his refusal to discuss his exile, but that even mentioning his recent past would prompt complete silence was... strange.

More than that, the silence never revealed anything about the elf other than that topic was out of bounds. It never had an edge of pain or sorrow or any other emotion. It was simply silence.

And the silence continued, despite that they stopped several times that afternoon, both to let Raistlin rest and to forage again for food. They got moving again soon enough, and by the time night had fallen they had made good progress north.

The mountains were too far east now to use as shelter, but the good weather promised to continue through the night. And this appeared to be the only good fortune they'd get tonight, Raistlin thought, scowling at the sodden wood that simply refused to catch fire. Another cold night. He'd had far too many of these lately and knew it would only be a matter of time before he fell ill.

They ate what food they had found during the day, both studying the other without speaking, both knowing that words were not necessary in this situation, and neither being the kind to speak simply to fill the silence.

The night was chilly, and that lack of a fire seemed to make it even more frigid. Raistlin, who never found it easy to rest, was awake long after Dalamar had fallen asleep. Thinking in an effort to drive thought of the cold out of his mind, Raistlin pondered the events of the past day, wondering on what he had learnt about his fascinating companion. Or rather what he had not learnt.

Somehow, Raistlin thought, the more he learnt about Dalamar, the more he was drawn to the Dark elf. He had a talent, as Raistlin did, of creating more questions than he answered, and these ever more tantalizing than the last. Why, what, how? He'd answer them and leave you thirsting to know more.

Raistlin caught that last thought. Who was he, he snarled internally; he sounded like some lovesick poet. When had his fascination with the Dark elf turned into an obsession? When had Dalamar become the only thing to occupy his thoughts, excluding even the magic?

And why?

Suddenly their game seemed to have become even more complicated.

_Skull Bearer._


	3. Obsession

**Enigma**

Chapter three- Obsession.

_"Star by Star  
Corrupting all of humanity"  
-Star by Star, Kovenant._

The fine weather of the day before continued, the bright light of dawn awaking Raistlin. The human was stiff, freezing and shivering after having finally fallen asleep just after moonrise. Dalamar wasn't much better off.

"Still alive?" The Dark elf said softly to Raistlin, voice letting slip both wry humour and slight concern.

Concern? Raistlin though scornfully, did his companion think so little of him that he thought him incapable of surviving this night?

If so, why would he care? Was he worried Raistlin would die before Dalamar understood him? Or was it something else-

Stop that. Raistlin told himself. You're behaving like an idiot. "I'm fine," He answered Dalamar, the coldness in his voice matching that in the air.

Dalamar gave a small non-smile that seemed both ironic and slightly sad before turning and packing up. The morning passed largely in silence, Raistlin not speaking unless spoken to, and answering questions both curtly and in as few words as possible, not posing any of his own, he lagged behind Dalamar, head down, offering no clue as to his thoughts.

Inside, he seethed.

How could he have lost control enough to be so taken up in this? How could he have lost so much control around someone he'd not even known for two days? How could he have lost control so much that he let them occupy his every waking thought for so long?

How could this fascination turn to obsession so quickly that he hadn't realised?

He didn't know, and that was what stung most of all, that and the fact that he had to admit that he had enjoyed losing that control, enjoyed feeling fascination and obsession for someone he barely knew.  
And there was nothing he could do about it.

No matter how much he scorned himself for allowing the obsession, no matter how he scorned Dalamar for being the one to inspire it, he could not kill the emotion.

Dalamar had clearly realized something was amiss with his companion, glancing back at him occasionally, puzzled, and once he almost looked pleased. Pleased? Raistlin thought, why would he looked pleased? Although, it didn't look as though it was because of what he himself was doing, but rather because of something he wasn't doing. He appeared almost... relieved. Enough! Raistlin snarled mentally, trying unsuccessfully, to push the thoughts out of his mind. Seething that he couldn't do it.  
It was intolerable that though Raistlin had prized spending so long looking inwards so that he could read both himself and others perfectly, it was that very skill that had both created this problem and been unable to solve it.

Obsession.

How had this happened? Raistlin demanded himself, How? And why could he not dispel what he felt as he often did? Why couldn't he ignore it like he did so many others? How did he lose so much control that he became driven by emotion rather than driving it?

Worse, why did he do nothing to regain it?

Raistlin didn't warn Dalamar that he needed to rest, preferring to collapse on the verge and hope the Dark elf would walk on and ignore him. Needless to say that that didn't happen, Dalamar noticed Raistlin was no longer following him and walked back, seating himself beside the human and looking at him, his eyes holding a touch of amusement.

"Did you think you could drop out of the game so fast? I heard you stop walking." Dalamar smiled slyly.

"And why didn't just keep going?" Raistlin snarled at the Dark elf.

Dalamar smiled, slightly mocking, which made Raistlin's blood boil. "You know. Try not to make yourself less intelligent that you are, _enigma_." Dalamar sat up, he was only a few inches taller than Raistlin, yet at that moment he seemed to tower over the human, a sharp, confidant smile on his face.

Raistlin drew his mind back together with an effort, sealing stray thoughts dispersed by self-scorn into a seamless fortress of will, behind which he hid his thoughts and emotions; desperate to keep them secret and avoid Dalamar realizing that he had mentally been associating him with that very word since he had met him.

Unless he'd already guessed.

With this one you never knew for sure.

It was the very first time that Raistlin received first hand the impression he himself made on most people, cold, cunning and able to read you like a book. It was the very first time Raistlin felt so wrong-footed he felt crushed. Dalamar had gained an advantage over him and Raistlin knew it and somehow revelled in it and the knowledge that their game had once again been made more complex, even as he hated Dalamar for besting him.

Despite the impassable wall of will hiding his emotions, some must have shown through for Dalamar's smile both broadened and darkened as the thoughts passed through Raistlin's mind.

Then he changed the subject completely.

"You're tired again?" A question, not a statement, interes- Stop that stop that stop that!

"Yes." The ongoing mental argument and the lack of sleep made his answer just as sarcastic and angry as it would be if he was speaking to his brother, "Why else would I be sitting down here if I were not weak and tired?"

The Dark elf's dark grin slipped slowly into one of his enigmatic non-smiles which told nothing. "I never thought of you as weak."

Raistlin snarled back, "Then what? What do you want?"

Dalamar's face was just as secretive as his smile, "Why, to understand you of course, why else are we doing this but because we wish to understand? Unless, of course, you want to stop..."

Raistlin was about to tell Dalamar that this was exactly what he wanted, when he realized, quite sickeningly, that it wasn't, and that the Dark elf had manipulated him -him!- to admitting it to himself.

He did the only he could have done to save face, he got up and continued walking.

Dalamar wasn't openly smirking, although Raistlin would have expected him to, but Raistlin could feel it in his eyes anyway. He was angry; both at himself, for falling into the same trap he himself had laid many times; and at Dalamar, for setting it so well. He felt too, the pride he had swallowed settling in his stomach- the fact that it had taken an outsider to show him something about himself. That Dalamar had read him better than he could himself was a shame that would be with him for a while.

They broke off at midday to eat, also in silence, before walking on. Raistlin, though he didn't look at Dalamar, could feel the Dark elf's eyes boring into his back.

How had the elf seen what even he could not? How could he know his thoughts when even he himself didn't know them? How could he? How could he?  
_How could he!_

Raistlin suddenly wondered how often people had thought that when talking with him and had to stifle a small smirk, once again feeling challenged by the Dark elf. Dalamar was so good at this, as good as Raistlin was, he had let his mask slip, it would not do so again. Dalamar would find it much harder to read him next time. This time, when they started walking again after stopping to allow Raistlin to rest, he started to pose his questions again.  
"You are eighty five, you told me, at what point did you discover you had a talent for the magic?"

Dalamar seemed slightly taken aback at the sudden question, then smiled challengingly, "I'm so glad you've decide to join the game again, it was getting far too easy, I had no need to guard my thoughts and you gave information away so easily."

"I expect you'll find it much harder next time." Raistlin retorted, a slight smile on his lips.

The Dark elf smiled back, "I was a child when it was discovered I had mage-talent, much to the irritation of my superiors. They had no idea what to do with me, they never did."

Raistlin looked at him intently, "Why didn't they just change you to another rank, they have a house for mages, I believe?"

Dalamar nodded, a sneer on his lips that Raistlin knew was not directed at him, "House Mystic, but you can't just change castes in Silvanesti, you're born in one and you die in one."

"And that's it?" Raistlin couldn't hide his incredulity.

"And that's it."

"You're eighty five. In human years, that would make you about my age, perhaps a little older, and like me you can cast spells. You're certainly talented. Were they prepared to waste that?"

Dalamar smiled at him, and Raistlin suspected that despite himself, he had deeply appreciated the compliment. "Thank you. And yes, they were."

Raistlin shook his head in amazement. "Absurd."

Again, he saw the Dark elf give an appreciative smile. "And what about you? What did your people say when you started learning the magic?"

Raistlin shrugged, "Not much. People never really cared."

"Even your family? What did they think?"

"My sister was the one to suggest I learn the magic-" one of the few decent things Kitiara had done for him, "and as for my brother... It's debatable whether he thinks at all."

Dalamar raised an eyebrow at him and this time they both shared the smile, one made much brighter by the sudden warmth that seemed to have settled in Raistlin's chest.

* * *

They stopped a good while after nightfall, due to Solinari being full and casting enough light to see by. Dalamar could have gone on further, no doubt, but Raistlin couldn't. They stopped in a grove of oaks to set up camp. They found enough dry wood there to make a small fire, around which they ate in silence.

Dalamar got up and sat right beside Raistlin and looked at him, "Tell me, why do you get tired so fast? Are you naturally frail, or something else?"

"We've had this conversation before." Raistlin snapped, he was tired and it made him short-tempered. Oddly, he felt a rare pang of guilt for being so brusque.

When the Dark elf didn't answer, Raistlin settled that as the end of the conversation, then jerked back in shock as Dalamar reached out one hand and took hold of Raistlin's arm. The long fingers closed around his thin wrist, first running his free hand up his arm, pushing back the sleeve of his white robes. The human mage shivered as the light touch  
raised the hairs on his body, a shiver that had nothing to do with the cold. The Dark elf's face was close to his, the firelight making his eyes glint silver and playing on his long hair and sharp features. His hand stroked down, tracing the veins inside his arm, leaving a trail of cold fire where his fingers had touched the sensitive skin.

"Very thin." Dalamar murmured, "You are so very thin. A scholar then? Did you ignore the body in favour of the mind, or were you never strong; leaving the magic as much a refuge as a gift?" Dalamar's knowing smile was almost gentle and told Raistlin that the Dark elf already knew the answer.

The hand holding Raistlin's wrist loosened, the fingers tracing slow circles on the tender skin, his thumb sliding up to stroke over his palm.  
The contact was strange, alien, and Raistlin felt both hot and cold, his skin tingling invitingly and a strange fire starting in his belly; "A refuge, a gift, a home, a strength. Choose which one, you know them as well as me." He said softly, looking down at the hand holding his and barely realising what he was saying.

Dalamar's fingers slid back up his arm and tilted his chin up so their eyes met. For one crazy moment, Raistlin was sure the elf was going to kiss him, a thought that evoked a mass of conflicting emotions within him.

"You love the magic, as do I." Dalamar added softly.

Raistlin narrowed his eyes slightly at the Dark elf's choice of words. He couldn't seem to slow his breathing. "Does one love the air he breaths? Magic is my life, as it is yours.  
Without it, we are nothing." He managed to keep his voice steady, and smiled in triumph at the elf's surprise at his words, clearly, he had read the elf correctly over the last few days, understood his dependence on magic, they were on equal footing again.

"No." Dalamar's voice broke into his thoughts, a soft hiss that sent shivers up his spine, "Magic is my life, not yours. Without the magic, I would not live. To you, magic is your reason for living. You are a bird: frail, weak and helpless. The magic makes the feathers that will let you soar."

Raistlin shivered as the Dark elf's words slid down his backbone like ice, as his burning fingers traced out the bones in the his arm. Hot and cold.

"Believe me," Dalamar whispered, "it will, and I will not be the one to drag you down, you needn't fear that." They had subconsciously moved closer and Raistlin could feel the heat of his body, the same heat that filled the words he spoke, the same heat that burned into his arm from Dalamar's clenched hands. He trembled again, unable to look away from those fire-splashed silver eyes.

"I do not fear you." Raistlin breathed, his stomach knotting, afraid the elf would pull away and terrified that he wouldn't.

"Then stop acting as if you do." Dalamar's eyes didn't break from Raistlin's, hypnotising. Serpent's eyes. "If that isn't the reason, then what is? You are afraid that this fascination will forge your end, that curiosity will kill the cat in the most literal meaning possible. Let me tell you now, Raistlin Majere, you have nothing to fear from me." He stared even more penetratingly into his eyes, his beautiful face so close that Raistlin could feel his breath, hot against his face.

Then he released Raistlin and stood, haloed in the firelight.

And walked away, leaving Raistlin furious, shaken and achingly aroused.

Raistlin shivered again, dragging his cloak closer around him. His skin burnt, as much from desire as from humiliation. This had gone too far, to be so far out of his depth that Dalamar found it so easy to play on his emotions, to touch him like... like...  
He felt both abashed and confused at his reaction, to his sudden desire at Dalamar's touch, shocked at his body for betraying him, and confused that the Dark elf was the one to have that effect on him.

And why had Dalamar done it in the first place?

This was no time to ask, Dalamar was asleep and he was exhausted, he would be best off sleeping and leaving his questions for another day.

Despite being tired, he was sure it would take him again long time to get to sleep.

_Skull Bearer_


	4. Attraction

**Enigma**

Chapter four- Attraction

_ "So much alike are we  
When I see you I see me"  
-Star by Star, Kovenant._

If Raistlin slept that night, he didn't remember it. When the sun rose the next day he greeted it with open eyes, sitting hunched over the ashes of the fire, staring at them and trying to make sense of his conflicting emotions. He... he had no idea how he felt, as soon as he thought he had found even ground within his mind, Dalamar had come again and turned everything upside down once again.

He felt so utterly confused.

For the fourth time during that night and this early morning, Raistlin attempted to make sense of his thoughts.

First obsession, now... attraction?

Was that it, Raistlin wondered, he was drawn to the Dark elf?

If so, how?

He found the elf fascinating, yes he knew that, was obsessed with him, yes- a shameful realisation still- but attracted?

Raistlin had to admit he didn't know, he simply felt captivated by the elf, a sensation less overwhelming than his previous obsession, but much deeper and even more insidious. Whether the previous night's events had started this new development or it had been growing in his mind and soul for the past few days, Raistlin didn't know. All he did know was that he felt confused and part of him wished fervently he had never met Dalamar Nightson to begin with.

The Dark elf himself woke up at that moment, rolling over and pulling his cloak- which was serving him as a blanket- over his shoulders. He got up, having slept in his robes, and walked over to Raistlin and sat back down beside him. "You didn't sleep last night, I see." He said, his not-smile just curving his lips. "May I ask why?"

Raistlin rubbed his eyes, although he had no mirror he guessed he had shadows under them. "If you are so clever, Nightson, find out yourself." He was in no mood to dance around the elf today, too tired.

Dalamar nodded, "I think I could guess. I can only say that I have told you I am no threat to you, and I mean it." He walked back to wash at a nearby stream and pack up, leaving Raistlin even more confused, if slightly relieved.

The expression in the elf's eyes had told him exactly what he needed to know, it couldn't be faked, it was the truth. This wasn't one of the Dark elf's ploys in this bizarre game of theirs, he was on no more even grounding than Raistlin, and he too felt the attraction and was confused by it. But he managed to sleep last night, you didn't, he argued with himself. Finally, so tired he didn't care any more, he let the matter die then and there, focusing his little energy on getting up and active. He decided against washing at the stream, the events of the previous night were still too vivid for him to want to disrobe anywhere near the Dark elf.

They walked side by side today, not speaking, stares locking more often, and several times, Raistlin felt the slow, banked fire that had tormented him the evening before, the burning urge to touch the Dark elf. The encounter last night had shaken everything again and both needed affirmation.

Oh by the Gods, what had he gotten himself into? Raistlin wondered, glancing across at Dalamar who walked with his head down, studying the ground. And where is this leading us?

He could stop this, whatever it was, as soon as he wanted. He would just tell Dalamar that he was no longer playing his twisted game and ignore him. He could, but Raistlin knew very well that he wouldn't.

Curiosity, a mage's curse.

He kept walking, thoughts retracing the same paths as before, grinding his mind into a rut. He might be going somewhere, but his thoughts most certainly weren't.

Over and over again.

He was still curious about Dalamar, wanted to know the Dark elf, his life, his mind and most of all how he became so good at manipulation; both of himself and others.

He was still fascinated by the enigma the Dark elf represented, amazed that anyone had managed to hone their mind until even he couldn't see through them.

He was still obsessed with the elf, who occupied his thoughts and had dominated them for more than half a week now.

And now these emotions had turned into a mysterious feeling of attraction that he couldn't define or explain. He felt that he should stay with Dalamar, for what reason he didn't know, but he felt deeply drawn to the elf. More than his touch, more that for this game, whatever the reason, at the moment Raistlin was in no state to work it out.

The day seemed to drag on longer than the other three had previously, and as the sun rose to its zenith it proved to be also the hottest. The air felt oppressive and damp, the flies a constant plague. Raistlin found himself breathless in the heat of the noonday and was forced to rest more often.

"Why do you wait for me?" He asked irritably as he and Dalamar found themselves once again sitting on the grass by the side of the road.

"You're fascinating, I have no wish to leave you behind." Dalamar was impassive, as usual.

"This game has moved beyond fascination for both of us." Raistlin snapped back, and was rewarded by seeing the elf's expressionless mask slip, revealing him to be just as lost as the human. He nodded, turning his head to stare at the open road.

"Was this what you had in mind when we began this little mutual inquisition?"

Dalamar shrugged, "As if I know; believe me Raistlin, if anyone knows where this is heading it is you."

"I know nothing."

"And I know less."

The tension increased again, and Raistlin sighed. It was so hard to hold his own against the Dark elf. One of the reasons for his interest in Dalamar lay in just how different he was from anyone else Raistlin knew, and one of the reasons for the difficulties he faced with the elf was that he had no idea how to act around him. The way Dalamar treated him was unlike any he had ever known. He didn't taunt him; like his classmates, he didn't patronise him; like Caramon, he didn't scorn him; like most did, and most of all; unlike just about everyone Raistlin knew, Dalamar didn't feel uneasy around him.

Unlike his own feelings towards the Dark elf! Raistlin thought wryly, although that wasn't true, his unease around the elf stemmed mostly from a feeling that he shouldn't be at ease around him. Without that, like during many of their previous conversations, Raistlin had felt quite relaxed.

Finally looking up from where he had been studying the road, lost in thought, Raistlin gazed at Dalamar, "Why else are we doing this but that we wish to understand?" He mimicked the elf's earlier words. "Unless, of course, you want to stop..."

Dalamar blinked, surprised at having his own words throw back at him, then laughed, truly amused despite himself. "Ah, Raistlin, you read me better than I give you credit for."

The tension again somewhat dispelled, they got up and began to walk once again.

Once back on the road, Raistlin attempted to draw the elf into a conversation, yet found himself either ignored by Dalamar, or answered in short monosyllables- "Yes." "No." "I don't know"- which dried up conversation faster than a riverbed in summer, giving Raistlin again the sensation of being on the receiving end of one of his own 'don't talk to me' tactics.

And why was the Dark elf so absorbed in his thoughts? Raistlin had been watching him, and could see why Dalamar had been able to read him so well when he was the one not talking. Emotions flashed quite openly on his face while he stared at the ground, still silent. Confusion, interest, fear- fear? Why would he fear? -and slight wistfulness crossed Dalamar's features. Clearly, Raistlin had been right in thinking this wasn't a ploy by Dalamar to get him to reveal himself, the elf was as bewildered by this change in emotions as he was.

This was going to be a long day.

It was a long day, a day where Raistlin found himself watching Dalamar more often than not. The elf had not spoken for the rest of the day; not even when they had halted for noon meal, yet Raistlin had felt his eyes drawn back to the silent figure of the Dark elf walking beside him.

Again the curiosity.

Again the fascination.

Again the obsession.

Again the maddening, unceasing attraction.

Unbidden, the memory of his reaction to their nighttime conversation, if it could be termed that, rose from whatever dark corner of his mind he had shoved it into earlier.

Attracted...

In a sexual way?

This was unknown ground for Raistlin, whose knowledge of carnal matters only stretched to a vague desire for a woman named Miranda, a desire he had quashed with the knowledge that she barely knew he existed and no doubt didn't care.

If not sexual, then what?

He had no idea.

And if sexual, what then?

Why did he feel attracted to Dalamar, an elf, and another male? Raistlin, despite being ignorant on matters of love and desire, was not naive. He knew that some preferred the sexual company of their own gender, rather than the opposite. He'd just never thought of himself as one of them.

But then again, he'd never thought of himself as anything in that context, and he would not deny that the elf was certainly good looking. Not to mention very intriguing.

So what to make of the Dark elf? One or the other?

He didn't know. These past few days had revealed a lot that he had either not noticed or ignored, and the fallout for that was unpleasant.

Raistlin had been aware that he was being watched for some time now and had done his best not to repeat his mistake; keeping his face carefully blank as he pondered, now he looked up and met Dalamar's eyes.

"Yes?" He asked as innocently as he could.

The Dark elf gave a small non-smile. "This has gone out of our control, hasn't it?"

Taken aback by the directness of the statement, Raistlin just nodded.

"Odd really," Dalamar continued, his voice unnaturally calm, "I'm not used to losing control, neither are you; I imagine, but it is odd -" He locked his gaze penetratingly with Raistlin's "- that we should be controlled by our emotions when we have worked so hard to control them."

Raistlin nodded again, Dalamar was saying nothing that he hadn't realized before, but he was curious to know where the Dark elf was heading with this small speech.

"I just never really thought -" He broke off.

When Dalamar didn't continue, he spoke- "Well?"

"Well what?" Dalamar looked, once again, impassive.

"What were you going to say?"

"Nothing."

"Noth- Oh to the Abyss with it." Exasperated, Raistlin shook his head and gave up on the conversation. He had read enough from the Dark elf's expression to guess at what the rest of the sentence would have been.

I never really thought I would lose that control, even around you- or perhaps- especially around you.

Again, Raistlin wondered where this game, although it was getting less like a game by the minute, would take them.

By the time evening came, Raistlin was more than thankful for it. He was exhausted, both in body and in mind, and he hoped that this night would offer far more in sleep than the previous one had.

Gods he was tired, he couldn't quite remember that last time he had felt this taxed, physically and mentally- especially mentally, Raistlin thought, keeping up with the mind-games this situation required took a lot of concentration.

It was the first time that Raistlin honestly considered stopping their game, if only because they both that their own issues to sort out. Giving that thought only a full second's consideration showed the flaws in it, their game and their issues were so closely linked that they were impossible to separate. It was all or nothing and Raistlin was not one to abandon this challenge just as it had gotten so interesting. He had no idea where it led, but it was unlikely to be dangerous. He did trust the Dark elf to uphold his promise; /I will not be the one to drag you down./ That, he believed, and that was another point. Trust. Did he really trust Dalamar? And if so, how far?

He trusted Dalamar because he saw something of himself in the Dark elf's eyes, he knew when he was to be trusted and when not, and so far, he hadn't been proved wrong.

So the question was, did he trust himself?

Again, he didn't know.

Would he advise Dalamar to trust him? Right now?

Yes, he would.

Then could he trust the Dark elf? Given as Dalamar had asked Raistlin to trust him?

Perhaps.

Well, that was more than he had ever given anyone else.

It just mattered how right he was in seeing himself in the Dark elf, he understood Dalamar, up to a point. They were different after all, Dalamar lacked Raistlin's need to prove himself, was devoted to the magic in a very different way, and seemed to be happier in the shadows than in the open. He didn't have Raistlin's burning desire for admiration. They were different, they were different people.

So why was he, who had never trusted anyone but himself, beginning to trust someone he had known for less than a week?

Perhaps because he _could_ no longer trust himself.

He was still lost in thought when Dalamar walked over and sat beside him as he had every other night they had travelled together.

"I can read your emotions like a book, aren't you even bothering to hide them?" He asked, voice hinting at disapproval.

"You yourself have said this has gone beyond a game." Raistlin replied coldly. "So do not bother to try and turn it back into one, that is impossible."

Dalamar actually looked abashed, then nodded. "You're right, of course," He sighed, "and after-" He broke off again.

"After last night," Raistlin finished off, just as coolly as ever, "What were you going to say?"

"Never mind."

"No matter, I'm sure I can fill in the words for myself." How strange, Raistlin thought, such a reversal in positions. "What did you want last night?"

"Never mind." Dalamar repeated sharply, his eyes darkening.

"You're angry." A statement.

"Just leave me now, I don't want to talk."

Raistlin shrugged, then settled himself more comfortable by the fire. "Then by all means, stay silent. Your face tells me everything I want to know anyway."

This time, the tension burnt as hot as the fire.

Raistlin didn't think he would ever get to sleep that night, but by the time they had torn themselves away from the fire and settled down for the night, Raistlin found himself yawning heavily. He rolled up in his blanket and spent his last few moments of consciousness thinking on what he'd learnt that evening. Dalamar was just as attracted to Raistlin as Raistlin was to him, and his fascination, like Raistlin's, may well have taken a sexual turn to desire. He was unsure how he felt about this but had seen, in the Dark elf's face, what Dalamar felt, fear.

Dalamar was afraid, of him? Perhaps. Of where this was taking them? Very likely, Raistlin wouldn't blame him, really...

His thoughts trailed off as he fell asleep at last.

Let fate take them where it would.

_Skull Bearer_


	5. Desire

**Enigma**

Chapter five- Desire

_"Galaxies glitter in the black night sky,  
Towards progress, towards death  
From the stars we have come,  
and to the stars we will return"  
-Star by Star, Kovenant._

Raistlin spent most of the next morning watching Dalamar. The Dark elf was still sullen and silent when he had woken up, all but ignoring Raistlin, avoiding looking at him and speaking only when spoken to, and that short and curt. At that moment, he was packing up his meagre belongings while Raistlin watched from beside the extinguished fire; his lips were pursed, eyes narrowed and he seemed to be focusing not on the task, but on pretending Raistlin didn't exist.

As Raistlin watched he stood up, straightened his robes and turned to meet the mage's gaze before jerking his head towards the road. Let's go.

Raistlin got to his feet and followed the elf, eyes boring into his back. Had their emotions changed yet again without their notice?

Curiosity to fascination? The more he had learnt about the elf through that curiosity, the more fascinated he was with him, this was obvious and Dalamar must have felt the same change.

Fascination to obsession? Harder, he was still unsure how that change had come about. If he had to guess, he would say through the same way as the previous change. The more he studied his companion, the more he had come to monopolise his attention.

Obsession to attraction? Much clearer, a natural emotional progression from one to the other.

Attraction to... Desire? Yes, that was what he felt, but the emotion was very different to the few times he had felt it before. It was not based so much on physical desire, he decided, although that was a factor and he would be the first to admit the Dark elf was exceptionally attractive, but rather the progression of the feelings he had been living with for the past few days. He wanted to know Dalamar, and what he had learnt had drawn him inexplicably to the Dark elf.

Desire, yes, but he wanted far more than what he had previously known, far more than what his idiot brother shared with giggling women. Just what that was, he hadn't the faintest idea, but he would, sooner or later he would understand.

And just how was he going to do that? He asked himself in the sarcastic, sneering voice that had been relatively absent in the past few days, What did _he_ know of matters of the flesh?

Even is his own mind the argument sounded hollow. It wasn't what he wanted, he didn't know what he wanted, but carnal gratification most certainly wasn't it.

Process of elimination then.

Was this lust? No, it went deeper than that.

Curiosity? Partly that, the enticement of the flesh in company of the fascination of the mind. But yet not.

A new form of obsession? No, different.

Love? Raistlin smiled at the very idea, yet part of him argued the point, he had never been in love, how could he tell what it felt like? If this was love then, then all the tales he had heard of romance were gibberish. Well, look who was telling them, he answered himself, your brother and some idiotic friends of his.

What did that leave?

Desire, plain and simple.

Raistlin smiled; glad that, today at least, he had gotten somewhere in unravelling the convoluted mess his mind had become.

Clearly, Raistlin thought, this change of emotion had disturbed Dalamar just as much as the change to obsession had disturbed him, perhaps more. By the time the sun had risen to its zenith and the elf still hadn't spoken a word, Raistlin had decided that whatever was behind the silence was more personal than he'd originally thought. Dalamar walked with his head down, studying the ground as he walked, disturbed.

If this was the case, what was it? The elf had proven exceptionally tight lipped about his past, both distant and recent and Raistlin for once couldn't guess what was making his companion so remote.

Quite honestly, he thought, if he had had to make a bet on which of them would be the more disturbed by this turn of events, he would have thought himself. He'd thought that Dalamar would have experienced what it was like to be someone's object of desire before, with his looks, the elf should have been of familiar ground.

Yet he clearly wasn't. Or perhaps he was, the mage thought, but didn't want this turn of events, if that was the case, why? More enigmas.

Raistlin was beginning to get sick of waiting for answers.

The road became more well travelled as they approached Solace, though it was still a good few days away, and for the first time since they had started travelling together, the two found themselves no longer alone on the road.

First they passed a peddler, wares roped to him, tottering up the road north, perhaps heading for Haven. Then a small mercenary group, also heading north, later still a gaggle of peasants, who gasped and scuttled away at the sight of the grim faced Dark elf. Dalamar had sighed and looked scornfully at Raistlin. "Fools." He spoke for the first time since that morning.

Raistlin glanced back to where the frightened peasants were just turning a bend out of sight. "Quite, although I've no doubt you look very threatening."

"Like I would waste magic on them." Dalamar turned away again.

"What is the matter with you?" Raistlin stepped closer to the elf, skin suddenly tingling at their proximity.

Dalamar didn't answer, simply picking up his pace and putting space between them again.

It was evening before Dalamar spoke again, they had stepped off the road and had just finished collecting dry firewood and the elf stood near the bundle he had just dropped, looking pensively at Raistlin.

"I am sorry about my reaction today." He said softly.

Raistlin blinked, surprised, an apology was the last thing he had been expecting from Dalamar.

"I can give only two reason for why I was so... antisocial, the first being that I had not remotely imagined this game would lead us here, and that I didn't want- well, I believed at first you would act like others I have known."

"You believed I would see this solely as a carnal matter." Raistlin finished.

"Exactly." Dalamar looked slightly relieved. "Of course, I don't know you yet. I can know most people backwards in less than a day, know how they act, what motivates them. Like you do."

Raistlin nodded.

"I don't know you fully now, but it's already been several days, which is a record I might add, so I do know you somewhat, well enough to know that lust would not be a motivator-or at least not the driving one- am I right so far?"

Raistlin nodded again.

"Good, forgive me but my previous interactions with humans have somewhat tainted my view of them." Dalamar lifted one hand and gently brushed the back of it against Raistlin's hair, the light touch sending a bolt of lightning up the human's spine. "I realized that your reasons for continuing this game- and I didn't doubt that that my emotions were shared-" A lopsided smile- "That was quite clear, especially after that night."

"And what are your motivations?" Raistlin was surprised at how calm his voice sounded considering how unsure he was. But then again, he had been sure of so very little in the past few days, what difference did this make?

"Desire." Dalamar gave a self-deprecating smile, "I'm sorry if I can't elaborate more than that."

"Don't be." He knew now why his voice was so calm, he felt so unreal and detached that no emotion could be injected into his voice at all. The thought that anyone would find him attractive would have been laughable only last week. Yet now... "I came to the same conclusion, and that was how far I was able to get." He wondered why he was telling the elf this, why this could be told but other issues couldn't.

It was Dalamar's turn to nod. The hand stroking his hair turned over, fingers entangling in the auburn strands. Raistlin shivered, for a moment he resisted the urge to lean into the caress, then gave in. After all that had happened, why not?

"I thought you might have, which brings me to the other reason I kept silence today." The hand in his hair urged Raistlin closer to the Dark elf until they were almost touching, eye to eye. "I had to know." Dalamar whispered, "I had to know I was right in thinking you were an exception, I had to get you off your guard and see if I was right."

Raistlin smiled, then shut his eyes when Dalamar lowered his head and kissed him. The elf's lips closed over his own, surprisingly soft, moving gently before pressing harder. Dalamar tilted his head slightly to get better access, a tongue parting Raistlin's lips and brushing against his teeth.

Raistlin shuddered. He had never actually been kissed before and knew practically nothing about it, but he knew that he was damned if he was going to let the Dark elf take control in this. They had began this game as equals and would continue it as such, even if the rules had now been irrevocably changed. Raistlin kissed back, lips moving clumsily against Dalamar's. His mouth opened accidentally, and he started, feeling the Dark elf's tongue slide over his teeth and into his mouth.

The touch was as galvanising as it was unexpected, and Raistlin shuddered, the intimate touch sending a bolt of pure lust straight through him. His head tilted back, Dalamar's hand cradling the back of his neck, and he groaned as the Dark elf drew closer, until the only thing between then was their clothing. He could feel Dalamar's heart beating beneath his robes, and the pleasant scratch as his hands combed through his hair.

They broke apart, breathing heavily. Dalamar's eyes were dilated, his hands still entangled in Raistlin's hair, while the human's were firmly clasped around the elf's waist. Raistlin shivered, suddenly quite aware of the sublimely painful ache between his legs, of the strange but deliciously arousing pressure of the elf's erection against his stomach, and that, unfortunately, they were in full view of anyone travelling the road.

As if echoing Raistlin's thought, although most likely he'd read it off his face, Dalamar pulled him away from the firelight into the shadows of a nearby hollow.

Once out of sight, the Dark Elf promptly pushed Raistlin back against the steep slope of the ditch and pressed their mouths together again.

Raistlin's arms wrapped around Dalamar's neck, clutching tightly as their teeth clashed together messily. A little tentatively, he tried to copy the elf, pushing his tongue into his mouth. Dalamar's teeth were strangely smooth, his tongue rough as it licked against his. Raistlin could taste the dried fruit they had had for supper, overlaying an earthy, autumnal taste that was at once strange and delicious.

Dalamar pulled away, his breath coming in short pants, one hand stroking roughly down the side of the human's face. Raistlin smiled up at him, one hand coiling around his neck. Dalamar was beautiful, the mixture of dim firelight and Lunitari's moonlight warped him into a something so surreal that Raistlin had problems believing what he was seeing. Beautiful to him, though not a romantic's idea of a lover, but beauty is fleeting and only skin deep anyway, when what drew Raistlin was what was behind those flame tinted eyes, that blood-bathed skin; a mind even he could barely read, yet one which drew him with every piece of knowledge uncovered, a spirit which matched his, will for will, a soul which seemed to echo his, despite or even because of their differences.

The first person Raistlin had met that he could full-heartedly respect.

Dalamar lowered his head again and trailed his tongue along Raistlin's neck, hands now fumbling with the ties of his robes. Raistlin let out a soft sigh of pleasure then had to bite his lip to avoid crying out as Dalamar bit down at the tender place where neck met collarbone, lightning burning down his spine.

"You can make all the noise you want," Dalamar whispered, the soft brush of breath sending shivers down Raistlin's back again. "It's the middle of the night, and no-one travels then, no one can hear you."

"Then why..." He groaned again as Dalamar nibbled his ear lightly "...are we down in this ditch?"

"Because you'd feel exposed out in the open and, tell the truth, so would I." Another light bite, this time at the side of his neck. "I have to ask, have you been with a man before?"

Raistlin was too distracted with what Dalamar was doing to him to be embarrassed of his reply- beyond the vaguely incredulous realisation that he was about to have sex with someone. "I've never even been with a woman before."

"Oh believe me," Dalamar whispered, "women are overrated."

_Again, the NC-17 version is up on my account._

_Skull Bearer_


	6. Respect

_(Dalamar's tale has had to be edited in keeping with the AU-ness of this fic, apologies to Dalamar fans.)_

**Enigma**

Chapter six- Respect.

_"The violence of passion - The passion of violence  
The perverse impulses - The savage egoism"  
Star by star, Kovenant_

Raistlin awoke stiff, damp and aching in places he didn't think possible. They were still in the ditch, Dalamar sprawled on top of him and asleep; a warm weight against the chill of early morning.

Memories of the previous night flickered into his mind like candles. Oh Gods, that was one night he was never going to forget. It had been, simply speaking, mind-blowing. Gods, oh Gods. He would definitely have to re-think his views on sex, anything that amazing couldn't be disgusting.

Raistlin craned his head and looked over at the Dark elf's sleeping face. This was the person he'd slept with last night- he, Raistlin, who thought the act sickening. This was the person who had made love to him. Who had shown him something he had never imagined, and made him feel, if only for once, beautiful and desired.

And he felt it again now, looking at Dalamar as he slept, feeling a warm bubble of strange, pure joy welling inside him. And in that moment the pain didn't matter, the cold didn't matter, and he couldn't care less how hard the ground was. He felt wonderful.

Raistlin curled a little closer to Dalamar, feeling a stab of pain as the motions pulled at already bruised muscles. He shook his head- this would take a while to get used to- but was unable to withhold a broad grin. He lifted one hand to run it through the elf's black hair, to his surprise the Dark elf growled and woke up the touch, glowering at him sleepily. "You nearly pulled my hair out last night, I'm still sore."

"What a coincidence, so am I." Raistlin replied wryly, another stab of pain running up his spine at the memory. He wondered how he was going to walk any distance today.

For a moment, he couldn't do anything but look down at Dalamar, grinning like an idiot. The Dark elf looked up at his through half-lidded eyes, smiling playfully in return. One hand was lifted and trailed lightly along Raistlin's jawbone.

Raistlin wanted to touch him, he wanted to hold Dalamar down and kiss him, and give him the same pleasure he had shown him last night. Instead, Dalamar rolled off him and stared up at the sky, one arm thrown over his chest,

"Are you sure you've never been with anyone prior to this?" He said curiously, "I find that rather hard to believe."

"Was I that good?" Incredulous, but absurdly pleased, Raistlin turned on his side and propped himself up on one arm to better read Dalamar's face.

"Well, you did everything right, if you get my meaning." Dalamar smiled lazily at him. "We should probably get going now, the day's getting on and we slept rather late. That is, we'll get going if you can walk." He didn't sound or appear mocking, quite serious. "I've been on the receiving end of the workout I gave you more than once, I know what it's  
like."

"That, I never doubted." Raistlin sat himself up against the side of the ditch, wincing at the complaints of bruised muscles. "And to answer your question, yes I think I can walk."

Dalamar nodded and slowly got up, then walked over to offer a hand to Raistlin.

"I'm quite certain I can manage standing up by myself." Raistlin frowned at the Dark elf.

"Believe me, you'll get up all right, you'd just fall over immediately."

Sure enough, when Raistlin stood up, a fiery jab of pain shot up his spine. He stumbled and would have fallen if Dalamar hadn't caught hold of him.

"Thank you."

"Don't bother being embarrassed, it's nothing to lose respect over, and you're welcome." Dalamar waited until he had regained support of himself, then, still holding his arm, pulled him over the side of the ditch.

There was a sense of awkwardness between them as they packed, washed and set off. Raistlin sighed slightly, he didn't want their coupling to get in the way of their relationship, whatever it was at the moment. Last night had been wonderful, but how would that impact on how they behaved during the day? In the silence between them he pondered that thought.

What was his relationship with the Dark elf?

They were lovers, yes, but what else?

Acquaintances? No, far closer than that.

Allies? That was obvious.

Friends? Perhaps, but defiantly not in the typical sense. They trusted each other; knowledge that Raistlin found hard to believe considering that he had previously given his trust to nobody, yet Dalamar now had it.

Respect too, Dalamar had his full respect.

He wanted to dispense with this feeling of awkwardness, and he knew how. "Where did you learn the magic?" Raistlin asked. "Not only from what little you were taught in Silvanesti, I'm sure."

Dalamar glanced at him and smiled slightly, appreciatingly. "Everywhere really. What little the Silvanesti would teach me I took in, some dark lore I found abandoned in a cave not far from my home, as to the rest," He smirked, "I stole, lied and cheated to get whatever I could get my hands on. Believe me Raistlin, you have it easy."

Raistlin thought of Theobald, his irritating classmates and the countless chores and decided against enlightening Dalamar, the elf had probably read all in his face anyway.

Definitely. Dalamar laughed, falling easily back into the old camaraderie they had previously enjoyed. "Perhaps you might not think so, but I've a feeling you've never had to sneak out in the middle of the night, up some dangerous cliff paths by moonlight, to study texts which may or may not get you killed."

"Admittedly not." Raistlin said. "But you didn't die."

"No...but exile is seen as a fate worse than death by the Silvanesti." Dalamar spoke softly.

Raistlin felt a stab of empathy. The elf hid the pain well, and Raistlin doubted he would have recognised it as such when they first met, but he was better at reading the elf now.

"Is it? To you?"

"I'm not a Silvanesti, not anymore." Dalamar's smile seemed more to hide his feelings than reveal them, as did his words.

Raistlin tried another track; this was the first time Dalamar had been in any way open about his past and he was determined to make the best of it. yet at the same time there was a feeling that perhaps he shouldn't probe such an obviously painful subject. Raistlin pushed that thought away impatiently- if Dalamar didn't want to answer a question, he wouldn't. "What did you find it the cave that could have got you killed?"

"Books of magic, old ones with wards to keep them safe. I couldn't make sense of much of them, but what I could understand was invaluable."

"All magic is invaluable," Raistlin shrugged, "Was this why you were exiled?"

Dalamar's smile turned bitter. "Precisely. I had gone to the cave, it was a good two years ago now. It was the first time I had gone there during the day, the first time I had admitted to myself where my heart really lay, not with the elven Gods of light, but with the God of dark magic; with Nuitari." Dalamar looked hard at Raistlin, "I have no idea why I'm telling you this."

"Because I won't berate you, accuse you or otherwise fail to understand what you did and why."

"You're quite right, thank you. When I arrived at the cave I gathered the books and knelt as far back in the shadows as I could get. I stacked the books next to me and spoke. I proclaimed my loyalty to Nuitari, swore myself... I...it's very hard to explain what happened then."

"I know what you mean." Raistlin did know exactly what Dalamar meant, having had a similar experience.

The Dark elf nodded, "I thought you might have. There was black fire, flames licking up from the books, flaring up yet creating more shadows than they revealed, flames as bright as if the books were going up in flames, but they weren't even singed... It was completely surreal, but beautiful."

Dalamar paused, and smiled, lifting one hand to his face, "I could see the night sky in those flames," He said softly, "The stars, the moons, _all_ the moons." He looked up at the sky as though he could see his patron's moon, smiling, "The first time I saw Nuitari." Dalamar seemed to be speaking to himself more than to Raistlin.

"And then?" Raistlin prompted as the elf fell silent.

"And then a band of elven guards rushed in and grabbed me." Dalamar's voice, snapped cold and impersonal. "My overseer, Eflid, had noticed I was missing and had ordered me found."

"What happened to the books?"

"Destroyed, no doubt." He shrugged.

"What a waste..."

"Yes."

"What happened after that?"

"I was tried and exiled."

"After that."

But it finally seemed he had gone too far. Dalamar clenched his jaw and refused to speak. His face once again became blank, but not before Raistlin had caught one poignant emotion.

Shame.

And again, that strange empathy, the urge to touch Dalamar- his shoulder, his arm, his cheek- and comfort him. Gods, this was getting more and more confusing by the day.

"Your turn," Dalamar's face was closed as he changed the subject, "Tell me about how you learnt the magic."

"I believe I've already told you."

"Yes, you did, now tell it to me without the evasions."

Make that by the hour.

"What evasions were you referring to, exactly?"

"All of them, but start off with telling me why when I asked what your family thought of you studying the art, you only told me about your siblings."

"Because neither of my parents had an opinion on the matter," Raistlin was surprised at how easy it was now to tell Dalamar this, while it had previously felt very awkward. Because he knew Dalamar was interested for his sake, while everyone else he'd talked to was only concerned with turning his life into their entertainment. "My father was never there and my mother...was a seer."

"Really?" Dalamar looked intrigued. "Untrained?"

Raistlin nodded.

"And by speaking of them in the past tense, I would deduce that they're both dead."

Raistlin nodded again. There was no pity in the Dark elf's eyes, rather a slight understanding. Of course he would understand, they had practically shared each other's thoughts for the past few days.

"I understand this was who you gained your powers from." Dalamar nodded thoughtfully.

"And you, from who did you inherit yours?" Raistlin asked, curious.

"No one, I was the first in my family," A dark smirk much like Raistlin's own, "much to the horror of those I served. Now, I believe it was your turn to speak."

"Ask what you want to know."

"Very well." Another thing to respect Dalamar for, he never lost his temper. Oh he was annoyed, only Caramon could stand Raistlin in this reluctant mood without becoming irritated, he just had the control necessary to hold it back. "You've been very reluctant to speak about your siblings except in the most passing terms, please explain."

Oh Gods, he didn't want to answer that. Quite honestly, he had no idea why telling Dalamar about his family seemed so repulsive.

No, he did know, because he didn't want Dalamar to know. He didn't want the Dark elf to act the way everyone did when the learned about Caramon and Kitiara.

He really hoped Dalamar had read his expression, he didn't want to explain. Jealous, of all things. Perhaps it would be better if he /didn't/ read his expression.

The Dark elf...just smiled again , "The sibling rivalry must be violent indeed if you don't want me to know about them."

Thank you Dalamar.

"Or is it that you're envious of them, and want to keep me to yourself?" Impressive how Dalamar had managed to make such an... erotic statement matter of fact.

"Both actually."

"Then I don't envy your home life." Blunt. "I'm with you because you're the first person I've met that I can honestly respect, both due to your talents and to who you are. The first. And I've met a lot of people. I trusted you to not behave like others have when we lay together last night, now trust me not to behave like others have when you tell me about your siblings."

"You've said all there is to say on the subject."

"One last question then, if they are as likeable as you suggest, how do they put up with you? You'd be the last person they could understand."

"My sister doesn't and my twin is an idiot who has convinced himself I must be coddled permanently, and no, neither of them understand."

"If your twin as that protective, why isn't he here with you?"

"Thank the Gods he isn't, he hurt a leg a few days before we were to leave and had to stay behind."

"Much to your delight."

"It is now."

They smirked at each other and Dalamar actually laughed a little, making a fellow traveller on the road jump and hurry away at top speed, as though expecting Dalamar to attack him. This simply made him laugh harder and even infect Raistlin with his amusement. How strange that the man could find Dalamar so alarming, while he had never been even remotely frightened of him. Perhaps he'd been able to read more of the elf's body language than he'd previously realised.

Evening came far too quickly. The day had been highly enjoyable for both of them and for the first time, Raistlin would quite happily have continued walking, if only for the conversation. However he was completely exhausted and the beating his body had taken the night before had not helped.

A beating that was likely to be repeated, if Dalamar's tactile advances were to be interpreted correctly.

They were again sitting beside a fire; within a small grove of trees in fact. Raistlin regretfully slapped off Dalamar's hand as it crawled its way under his collar. As much as he'd enjoyed the previous night, he was tired and didn't know if he'd be able to keep up with the rather amorous Dark elf- let alone how it would affect him tomorrow. Dalamar was sitting next to him, and he laughed in Raistlin's ear as the human mage tried to slide away. He wrapped an arm around his waist and pulled him unceremoniously into his lap. The elf's fingers dug playfully into the soft skin of his stomach, while his lips occupied themselves with the crook of his neck. Despite himself, Raistlin groaned, feeling his body react, and the Dark elf's hand gliding down to rub between his legs.

"I could barely walk today, I doubt I'll be able to walk tomorrow if you continue." Raistlin growled as Dalamar kissed his neck, licking the soft skin.

The Dark elf shifted and purred in his ear, one hand unfastening the ties of his robes; "If that's what you're worried about, we could try something else."

"Please Dalamar." Raistlin sighed, he hated being so ignorant. "As my experiences amount solely to what we shared last night, I haven't the faintest idea what you're talking about." He swallowed suddenly as Dalamar's hand slid inside his robes and stroked his stiffening flesh- his fingers were freezing.

The Dark elf smiled again, nibbling beneath Raistlin's ear. "Would you be opposed to the idea if I showed you?"

"As long as I'm capable of walking the next day, no"- and as long as you keep on doing that, Raistlin added silently. Once again, he wondered what he was getting himself into. One of Dalamar's hands caught at Raistlin's belt and untied it.

"Good."

_Again, the NC-17 version is up at my account._

_Skull Bearer._


	7. Belonging

**Enigma**

Chapter seven- Belonging

_"The wicked presence - The wicked essence  
The thing that unites us - The thing that divides us"  
Star by Star, Kovenant._

Once again Raistlin awoke with Dalamar acting as his blanket, only this morning he was not as sore as the previous. Dalamar had kept his bargain meticulously. Not that that had in anyway impaired him, if anything last night was even more incredible than the one before.

He'd had no idea one's mouth could be used in that way.

Gods, if this got any better, it would kill him.

He felt Dalamar stir, the Dark elf raising his head and smiling sleepily down at him. Raistlin couldn't quite place the expression, but it seemed that the Silvanesti was not in the least displeased with the situation. Neither was Raistlin to be honest, because although waking up next to- or under- someone was certainly an odd experience, it was a very pleasant one. How strange, that if he'd considered this before he met Dalamar, he would have found it disgusting. Well, everyone is wrong at some time or other.

Dalamar sat up, still perched on top of him, on his legs to be precise, and raised his hands above him in a long stretch- one, Raistlin suspected, that was entirely for his benefit.

"Good morning," He yawned, "Was last night to your liking?" He licked his lips playfully.

"Definitely," Raistlin felt himself blush but smiled back and was unable to restrain the temptation to run his fingers down the firm muscles of the elf's abdomen. "Clearly your mouth is just as talented at night as it is during the day," he purred, "Although I did wonder if I'd ever walk again after that."

Dalamar smiled, although Raistlin noticed it seemed slightly forced, and a glimmer of something unidentifiable flickered behind the Dark elf's eyes. He remembered the odd look he's seen in the elf's eyes when he pleasured him last night, and he smile faded. It was gone as soon as it appeared, and Dalamar's voice was calm when he answered, "Just as well that was only temporary."

"Speaking of which, we'd best be going." Raistlin tried to extricate himself from under the elf, but Dalamar just leant back down and easily pinned him to the ground by his shoulders. "Dalamar, let me up."

Dalamar lowered his head and kissed Raistlin lightly, just a brush of lips together. "And if I say no?"

"Why would you say no?"

"Because-" A kiss to his forehead, "I find you-" The elf's lips touched the skin between his eyes- " to be very attractive and-" A third kiss, on the bridge of his nose- "I want to make love to you again?" The last kiss would have been pressed to his lips again, but Raistlin turned his head away, looking up at the Dark elf in surprise. Dalamar was not teasing, he looked perfectly serious, and very eager.

Just as well, as Raistlin wouldn't have believed his ears otherwise. "You find me attractive?"

"Well, yes obviously." Dalamar rolled his eyes. "Don't tell me you've never been called that before."

"No, actually." Quite the opposite, he'd lost count of the times he'd been dismissed on those lines; too pale, too scrawny, too plain.

Dalamar obviously disagreed, he shook his head-"Good grief"- and bent down for another kiss.

After that, there was nothing more that Raistlin wanted then to surrender and let Dalamar show him what early morning lovemaking was like. But it wasn't early morning any more, and not only did they need to get going, but they were in full view from the road and he didn't like the idea of being spotted while... Raistlin turned his head away again, "Please don't, we need to get going and even if you want to- to do that again, I don't."

Liar.

"Are you sure about that?" Dalamar said wryly, pressing their bodies together a little closer. Raistlin bit back a groan as the elf's erection slid over his own hard flesh.

"What I want and what my body wants are different things." He snapped, things had not changed so much that his lust could overrule his mind. "Now get off me."

Dalamar did so, albeit reluctantly, then threw his robes at him. "Then put these on, stop tempting me."

Raistlin pulled his robes on, and started looking around for his boots. Dalamar hadn't seemed to care when he put them last night, and one had nearly landed in the fire. Raistlin shook his head before turning to Dalamar, "If that had burnt, I'd be expecting you to carry me," he teased, not entirely joking.

The elf didn't respond to Raistlin's jibe, not even turning around as he finished knotting the ties on his black robes. Raistlin frowned, Dalamar didn't seem to have even heard him, and his expression was very different from the one Raistlin had seen a few moments ago.

Dalamar didn't speak when started off again, the silence was far more strained than that the previous day, although Raistlin didn't think it was because of what had happened that morning. As they walked and Dalamar not only still didn't speak, but also seemed more and more distracted, Raistlin broke the silence.

"What exactly is bothering you?"

Dalamar sighed. For the first time since Raistlin had met him, he actually looked slightly despondent. "I'll have to leave soon." He tried to look nonchalant, and while it might have worked with others, Raistlin wasn't fooled.

"What do you mean?" He demanded, holding off the sharp spike of shocked pain with reason.

"I mean that I'll have to leave, next crossroads we come to, you'll go east and I'll go north."

Raistlin stared as if Dalamar had just slapped him, feeling the first formless tendrils of hurt and anger starting to reach for him. "And you want to leave?" His low voice didn't quite hide the bite of his words.

"No." Dalamar sighed. Something tense inside Raistlin unknotted, the tendrils fading.

"Is there any reason in particular you're going north?"

"Not really."

"Well then, what's the problem?" Exasperated.

"I can't come with you." Flatly stated.

"And why's that?"

"Oh for the love of Nuitari!" Dalamar shouted, the tense neutrality of his words and expression vanishing like a snowflake in the Abyss. "Because I'm a Dark elf! Do you think I'll just be let in?"

Raistlin shrugged slightly, what _this_ what Dalamar was worried about? "I can't see why you shouldn't, as long as you obey the laws. I have never seen anyone turned away from Solace."

"And what about you? How do you think that would make you look?"

Another shrug. "Everyone already distrusts me there, I don't have a reputation you could damage."

Dalamar calmed down, and took a deep breath before looking at Raistlin. "You wouldn't mind?"

"Oh, this is ridiculous." Raistlin snapped. "You know me. What with the amount of time we've spent playing this game it would be impossible not to, what do you think?"

Dalamar smiled, a real, pleased expression. "Thank you." The elf made no attempt to hide the joy in the words.

"You're welcome." Raistlin shook his head. Astonishing, a week spent reading each other's minds and the elf still hadn't got the message.

"Why did you want me to come with you?" Dalamar asked.

Raistlin would have to have been blind, deaf and more stupid than Caramon to miss the different levels of that question. He thought for a moment, then smiled. "Because I'm insanely curious, you're fascinating, have been my obsession for a while, are very attractive, plus I desire you, respect you and would like to stay with you a while longer?" A long while longer.

Dalamar smiled back, one of his few real smiles "Thank you. You want to stay with me? Feel owned?" The last was delivered with a touch of teasing.

Raistlin smiled back, Gods knew, he'd probably smiled more in the past week that in the whole of last year, or the year before that. There weren't many people who could make him smiled like Dalamar did, and that alone would be worth keeping the Dark elf around for. Once again, he felt the cool liquid joy fill him, definitely worth it. "No, merely that you should stay with me, at least for a while." He grinned, "If anything, you belong to me, it's my home we're going to after all."

Dalamar laughed, nodding, then shaking his head. "This is very strange."

Raistlin nodded back, smiling. "Yes." But it was a type of strangeness he would gladly put up with for a long, long time, when every change just made things better.

"I'll stay with you, at least for a while." Dalamar looked away, down the road, he really did look stunning, and even more so when he was smiling.

"Good." Raistlin answered, and meant it. No mater how strange this seemed, he was more than ready to try and make it work.

"How far is Solace?"

"We should reach it by tomorrow evening."

Raistlin glanced over at Dalamar, the elf was continuing his silence, although it was no longer strained. It was a warm silence, deeply pleasant, and again Raistlin smiled.

Belonging?

It was the right word, yes, but what did it mean?

Not like being owned, of course; or owning, despite his jesting words to Dalamar, so what was it like?

Like he belonged with the Dark elf?

Yes, in a way. He enjoyed his company, both their conversations and- Raistlin blushed, but firmly finished the thought- sex were wonderful, he respected Dalamar, even trusted him.

Yet what ties _did_ they share?

Ties as lovers.

Ties as companions.

Ties as mages.

Ties as... friends? Yes.

Ties of respect, trust... Belonging? Caring? He didn't know.

He'd find out, of that he had no doubt.

Raistlin just wondered what he'd find.

The road was getting far more well travelled as they approached Solace, turning down the east fork in the road which would, in other circumstances, have them separating. Unfortunately, this meant that not only they saw more people now, but that the people they passed recognized Raistlin more often than not. Their only luck, as Dalamar so succinctly put it, was that Raistlin's social life was so nonexistent that he got, at most, a nod or a brief greeting, often accompanied by an odd look at his choice of companions. But as Raistlin had predicted, no one said anything about Dalamar's presence, something the elf was evidently very pleased about.

By nightfall they were finally in view of the great vallenwood trees. Raistlin smiled at how Dalamar's eyes widened at the sight of them. As much as he disliked the people in it, he did like Solace, and it gave him an odd pride to see Dalamar so impressed. "That's something to see, and you say you live in the branches?"

"Everyone does."

"Wouldn't help to suffer from vertigo, then."

"Not in the least. Why? Do you?" The unspoken words- that Dalamar had better not since he would be staying with Raistlin- hung in the air.

The Dark elf smiled, and shook his head.

They set up camp that night in a rather exposed location about half a mile from the edge of the trees. Due to the lack of cover, any physical activities other than sleeping had to be postponed for the night, although that didn't stop Dalamar from crawling into Raistlin's bedroll asleep wrapped around him.

Raistlin minded this not at all, the night was cold and while it wasn't the same as making love, sleeping together had an gentle charm of it's own. He could feel Dalamar's body pressed close to him, the warmth of his skin and the odd sensation of bone and muscle under the velvet softness of skin. Again, a strangeness he would gladly get used to. Raistlin smiled, and idly stroked the elf's rather matted hair and pondering their next move.

From curiosity to fascination.

From fascination to obsession.

From obsession to attraction.

From attraction to desire.

From desire to respect.

From respect to belonging.

Day by day their emotions had been changing, what was this the next change? They felt secure in each other's presence. Not simply not feeling threatened by the other but actually feeling safer with the other around. He hadn't wanted Dalamar to leave because he really enjoyed the Dark elf's company and not just because of the puzzle he posed. What was that then? That he would suddenly so freely trade the privacy he had held dear for so long to someone who he had known for so short a time seemed incomprehensible, but it had been so easy...

So easy to learn how to care?

His train of thought was interrupted by Dalamar stirring. He lifted his head from where Raistlin's chest was serving him as a pillow and blinked blearily at him.

"Do you mind not thinking so loud? You woke me up." He gave the small non-smile Raistlin hadn't seen for a while.

"Apologies."

"None needed." Dalamar rolled over next to him, staring up through the canopy of new leaves at the starry sky. "Now what were you thinking? I'm too sleepy to read it out of your mind so please tell me."

"Simply thinking that I like being around you."

"You feel safer, I expect," Dalamar let his head drop back down, and Raistlin felt the elf smile against his skin, "Like you belong and want to stay with me?"

"Even half asleep you still succeed in being shrewd."

"I know my emotions, and I know that you share them." Dalamar slipped his arms around Raistlin and closed his eyes, still with that small smile on his face.

"Do you trust me?"

"Mm-hum." The elf seemed to be well on his way to falling asleep again.

"Then tell me why you refuse to talk about the years of your exile."

Dalamar's eyes snapped open again, his smile vanished just as fast. "Never one to let an opportunity slip by, are you?"

"Never."

"Fine." Dalamar's expression became harsher, more brittle, and the iron mask Raistlin had glimpsed a few times slammed down behind his eyes like a headman's axe. Still, it didn't manage to disguise the lingering pain in his voice when he spoke "The reason I didn't want to tell you, is that I thought you'd rather not know that your lover has been selling himself as a whore for the past two years."

Raistlin stared, absolutely stunned at how bluntly Dalamar spoke. "Why?"

Dalamar's lips twisted in a sneer, and for the first time he looked truly menacing. Raistlin might have moved away, but he knew better and just drew closer.

"You try surviving when everyone fears and hates you." Dalamar's voice was a snarl. "In the end it came between my pride, self respect or my life; well, pride went first, self respect if I had to but my life I'd keep. There was no other way, believe me, I would have starved. Happy now?"

"No, not really. I'm sorry." Even to his ears, the words sounded empty and pathetic. He touched Dalamar's hair, trying to make up through touch when words failed him.

"Don't bother." The words were cold, but Dalamar leant impercievably into the caress. Raistlin pressed a kiss to his temple, stray strands of black hair sticking to his lips.

"Why didn't you want to tell me?" Raistlin whispered, the strands ticking his face.

"I'd imagined you'd think less of me, or worse, think that I was doing this for my own gain." Dalamar at least had the sense to look sheepish.

"And here I'd thought you knew me backwards, obviously not." It was odd, but he'd never thought that, it had never so much as crossed his mind, since it was so obviously not Dalamar's intention.

"I know now." Dalamar's hand touched his hair gently, and Raistlin felt lips brush the side of his face, "But thank you anyway."

Raistlin leant into the contact, and when slid an arm around the elf's waist, part of him wondered how often someone- not him- had done this, had touched Dalamar the way he did. A hot burn of jealousy scorched his throat, and he shoved the thought away. He was not going to prove Dalamar's assessment of him right, particularly now.

He kissed Dalamar's forehead in wordless reassurance and hugged him more closely, resting his head on his shoulder before drifting off to his own dreams.

_Skull Bearer._


	8. Caring

**Enigma**

Chapter eight- Caring

_"Star by Star  
Corrupting all of humanity  
So much alike are we  
When I see you I see me."  
-Star by Star, Kovenant_

It was mid morning when Raistlin woke up, having slept later than he usually did. He was usually an early riser, but it seemed he enjoyed sleeping with Dalamar too much to cut it short.  
The Dark elf was awake by that time, although he was still pressed up against Raistlin, face buried in his hair.

"Are you awake?" The Dark elf mumbled.

"Yes."

"Oh, good." Dalamar snuggled closer.

There was a moment's pause, then, "Shall we get up?"

"Not right now."

"Why?"

"Why not?"

"Get off me." Raistlin tried to hide the fondness in his voice, but failed. He wondered how Dalamar could do this, could offer himself so willingly after what had happened to him. If he had been in Dalamar's place, he doubted he could do the same, no matter how much he cared for the person. How much he cared for Dalamar. That was the word, the reason he'd not wanted to remind the Dark elf of bad memories, and why he wanted the elf to enjoy their sex as much as he did. It was why he'd felt sick when Dalamar had told him of his past last night. Because he cared for the Dark elf, cared for this person, who he'd met only a week ago. Cared for him more than he did for anyone else he knew.

Cared. For Dalamar.

And Dalamar cared for him too, because instead of insisting, he just sighed and rolled off Raistlin, who sat up and started getting dressed. "We'd better get going if we want to make it to Solace before dark," Raistlin changed the subject, "We should make the town outskirts by sunset if we start moving now."

"And what are you going to tell them when we get there?" Dalamar followed suit, demeanour switching from amused to slightly worried with surprising swiftness.

"Tell me, do you actually care what people think?" Raistlin looked at him curiously.

"No, but you might."

"As I said yesterday, they already dislike me," Dalamar would see in his face that the feelings were mutual, "I doubt you coming with me will change things one jot."

"And what happens when they discover you're sleeping with me?"

Raistlin gazed hard into Dalamar's face. "Does it look to you as though I care?" He doubted it would garner him any more scorn from those he knew. He was already mocked for so many reasons that sleeping with another man would hardly matter.

Dalamar smiled slightly. "No, not at all."

Raistlin smiled back, "You're very good at reading people, after all."

The day had promised to be an exceptionally hot one that morning, and now that promise was kept. The sun beat down on the road and the travellers on it; Raistlin felt irritated and uncomfortable and longed to get under the shade of the vallenwoods which now stretched just ahead, yet at the same time wished fervently they never got there.

Despite his uncaring words to Dalamar, he was dreading this confrontation, not with the other inhabitants of Solace, who he hardly cared about, not even with Caramon, who would make all too much of a fuss. It was Kitiara's reaction he most feared, if fear was the word. He'd been on the recieving end of her scorn too many times not to want to avoid it. He could deal with it from anyone else, with a sneer and a cutting remark, but Kitiara had been the only one who's disgust actually bothered him. It was a meeting he was longing to avoid, and he had no doubt Dalamar had been able to read the thoughts from his face.

"Well, it certainly looks as if you do care what some people think." Correct, as usual.

"Just one person." Raistlin replied as the two finally stepped under the overhanging boughs of the vallenwoods and out of the sun.

"And who could that be? Not your brother obviously by what you've told me of him."

"No, not him, my sister in fact, Kitiara."

"Ah, and why would you care?"

Raistlin shrugged indifferently.

"Yes, siblings can be like that."

Raistlin couldn't help but smile wryly. It still surprised him how good Dalamar was at reading him.

"And sibling rivalry most likely doesn't help." The Dark elf finished.

"No, it doesn't." He agreed, then wondered. Was this one reason why he was dreading the encounter? Was he afraid he would lose the Dalamar to his sister? Why? Wasn't she too busy with that Half-elf Tanis?

You know better than that, he sneered at himself, Like Kitiara would care what Tanis thought and since he's away, there's no need for her to worry. He'd already heard more than one rumour, and while Tanis might brush it off, Raistlin knew better. Dalamar would be the sort of person she would be interested in. As to why he worried about Dalamar turning away from him, he knew very well. He had heard it whispered enough in his mind not to have any doubts- Because she's fierce, sensual and beautiful, everything you're not.

But then, he thought- because the mind has a way of springing the worst fears at exactly the wrong moment- how would he feel if he was wrong and Dalamar decided he prefered Kitiara's company over his? It wasn't as if it hadn't happened before, although this would be the first time he cared about it. And he cared a lot. For someone who had always had so little to hold dear, to lose Dalamar would be a crushing blow, and not just to his ego. The Dark elf's companionship had been something he hadn't experienced before- to actually find someone who's presence he could not only tolerate, but also enjoy, and even- a worrying thought, depend on?

Yet, at the same time, Raistlin had grown to care about Dalamar a lot, enough that, should the elf confirm his fears, Raistlin really couldn't see what he could do to stop him. Dalamar didn't belong to him (although Raistlin would argue furiously that he certainly belonged _with_ him), and if the Dark elf prefered Kitiara's company to his... well, Raistlin would have to deal with that, as sickening as the notion was.

But yet... At the same time he was wondering about how Dalamar had twice fallen into a trap of fearing that Raistlin would act like others had. Was he doing the same? He had seen anough people taken by his sister, was that why he worried that Dalamar would do the same? In the eight days he had known Dalamar, was there any evidence that he would do as Raistlin suspected?

Not really.

No. Raistlin thought firmly, more than 'not really'. No. He wouldn't. He was good at reading Dalamar- better, probably, than the elf himself- and he knew that he wouldn't get rid of him just to go after his sister, especially after last night. To believe so would be to believe Dalamar had lied, and that, Raistlin knew perfectly, was a lie itself.

He knew Dalamar, and while he didn't know the elf perfectly- and now Raistlin suspected he never would, never completely, and the thought was wonderful- he knew him well enough to know that to even consider that he would leave him for someone else, so quickly- and based on physical attraction- was, well, cruel and vile and completely unfair, to name just a few.

He'd decided he could trust the Dark elf, now to prove that trust.

Dalamar had been quiet while Raistlin thought, but now he caught his eye and nodded at the great trees surrounding them. "How far is it to Solace?"

"Still quite a way, we should be there before nightfall though." Raistlin broke out of his reverie and glanced at Dalamar.

The elf looked nervous, an interesting expression for one who for most of their travels had been calm and controlled. But one fitting for one who had been shunned everywhere. Raistlin knew better than to worry about it happening again here, he had lived in Solace all his life, and the only person he had seen turned away had been the Widow Judith. And _that_, Raistlin thought savagely, had been perfectly well deserved.  
As long as Dalamar followed the laws and didn't stir up trouble, he would be allowed to stay there, which was just as well. Raistlin wasn't sure what he would do if it turned out otherwise- probably try to find him somewhere to stay nearby, since it seemed unthinkable that they should separate just when things were getting so interesting.

Gods, but he hoped-

Warm lips brushed his cheek lightly. Raistlin jumped at the sudden toutch, and turned to see Dalamar smiling.

"You're not going to do that in public, are you?" The human mage asked, half sarcastic to mask his thoughts.

The Dark elf just smiled again, "I would hardly call this public." he said.

Indeed, there was no one else in sight. Then one hand went to the back of Raistlin's neck and pulled him into another kiss, a far harsher one; teeth clashing, tongues twining, hungry and devouring which left them both breathless.

"Very nice." Dalamar remarked, licking his lips.

"Yes." Raistlin tried to appear nonchalant, a hopeless venture as they were both flushed, dazed and aroused. "Definitely not in public."

"No." Dalamar slid his arms around Raistlin's waist and pulled the slender mage close, chin resting on his head. "Definitely not."

Raistlin was quite sure the elf meant something else entirely.

* * *

It was quite late when they drew in sight of Solace, and night was falling over the small town by the time they arrived inside it's boundries. Raistlin smiled at the look on Dalamar's face as he looked up at the houses nestled within the boughs of the great trees. Again, he felt the odd pride at the elf's look of amazement, for all that Dalamar must have seen some strange things in his life, this was still enough to surprise him.

The elf caught Raistlin's eye and smiled back. "It really is quite something," he murmered, grey eyes tracing the walkways strung between the trees, before resting on one of the largest buildings. "Who lives there?"

Raistlin followed his gaze and smiled, "That's the Inn of the Last Home, they do good food there if you're hungry." He didn't have any money, having spent everything he had on the wagon ride to Qualinesti, but Otik knew him and would extend him credit.

Dalamar blinked, "You have your inn in the trees?" He gave Raistlin a sideways glance, "Is that the rule with everything else too?" He sounded incredulous.

"Everything except the smithy, yes." Raistlin started towards one of the stairways leading up to the inn, "And even then, that's probably only because it's run by a dwarf."

The Dark elf shook his head incredulously, then followed Raistlin. He paused, one hand on the handrail of the walkway. Although they were still some distance from Solace, the walkways stretched a long way; even over here, near Solace's other inn, the run-down Trough. "You say that the people here wouldn't object to me living here, do you think it'll be hard to find work?"

Raistlin could hear all too clearly what Dalamar didn't say, the memory of what he'd been forced to do in order to survive. He shook his head, in answer of both the silent question and the spoken one.  
"I think you shouldn't have much trouble, most of the people here would be glad to have some things done by magic- especially since my schoolmaster forbids anyone from so much as conjuring a fire, on pain of expusion." Raistlin scowled at the memory of the last shouting match he had endured on the topic. "You could ask at the inn, I'm sure someone would know."

Dalamar chuckled, and started up the steps after Raistlin. Despite his reassurance to the contrary, Raistlin saw him sway slightly when he looked down- a mistake. Vallenwoods were immensly tall and the buildings could be as much as thirty meters off the ground. It wasn't much to one who had lived his life in the trees, as Raistlin had, but apparently it was a bit much for Dalamar, who was holding on to the railings a bit more tightly than necessary. He kept climbing though, and gave Raistlin a slightly self-deprecating smile as he did so. Raistlin smiled back, and put a hand on the Dark elf's shoulder, an unconcious motion that surprised him. Dalamar lifted an eyebrow at the contact, and smiled again, a much happier expression that brought that familiar yet odd glow of warmth to Raistlin's chest.

Raistlin smiled back, and touched Dalamar's hand, the other gesturing to the view of tree-town. Here and there, the soft glow of firelight lit upn the various windows, making the trees look as if they were full of fireflies. As they watched, the lamps in the Inn of the Last Home were lit, and the night was filled with the miriad of stained glass colours.

They stood, watching the lights for a long time. It was an old sight to Raistlin, but one made new from sharing it. He felt as though he should say something, so he looked over at Dalamar. The Dark elf didn't catch his eye at first, still watching the lights with an odd look on his face, then he noticed Raistlin and smiled back.  
It was the most honest expression Raistlin had ever seen on anyone's face, and any doubts he might have had flew away in a moment. "Welcome to Solace" He said simply, but he knew perfectly well that Dalamar knew what he truely meant.

Welcome home.

_Skull Bearer._


	9. New Notes and Reviews

_Okay, so I hope you enjoyed this version of Enigma, there was so much that I didn't like in the old version (unsurprisingly, since this was written almost three years ago), and so many thanks for those who have followed this series for so long. I couldn't have done it without you -big hugs-_

_I am still working on the current installments of Ivory and Ebony, don't worry, but I simply had grown sick of all the typos and mistakes in this fic. A re-vamped version of Ice and Steel is also in the works, but since it would truely be a massive endevour, I'm leaving it for a moment and focusing on Alvorecer._

_Incidentally, any ideas of what you would like to see in Ice and Steel would be welcome. Any particular scenes or situations you would like to see? Ice and Steel won't be re-written so much as expanded upon, seeing as so much of it is summerised._

Reviews- old and new:

The Death Chamber: Legends is a great trilogy, not least because it introduces Dalamar, who is, after Raistlin, one of the coolest characters.

Daeric: Heh, I know I shouldn't be so amused, but if you look at my bio page you'll see that I've written somewhat more than just Enigma... Thank you for the lovely reviews, by the way.

Clownfood: Cheers!

Berylia Crystalia: Once again, thank you for reviewing just about all my stories.

Nuitari Aquarius: Heh, thank you, I hope you enjoy this version just as much.

Uke Love: Oh, I would debate that...

Kaiho Neko: Thank you hugs that means a lot, and thank you for the reviews.

Star Ruby: I hope you liekd them ;)

kari2500: The sequel is Ice and Steel, which you will find on my biopage. I hope you've got plenty of time...

Skye: At last, a kindred soul that recognises the fundemental rightness of R/D! Thank you.

The Pessimistic Panda: I hoped you found them pertty, Shalafi ;)

juonetar: Thank you so much!

Shannon Holmes: Thank you.

Robin: This was something I tried to fix in the new version, hope it worked.

Ahn-Li Steffraini- Thank for an intelligent (if short) comment, although I don't understand your views on slash as it is my lifeblood.

Pen D. Fox- You will kill me when I tell you I'd written the whole thing when I started posting. I just thought 16,000+ words was a bit off-putting. Sorry if I cause you premanent brain damage and thank you for the wonderful reviews.

Guan- Thank you.

MysticDragonstar- Thank you too.

alien21xx- There are far too few Raistlin/Dalamar fics period, especially if you are an addict like me, I tried my best and my muses have been on strike for the past few days and are only just reviving.  
This is exactly why I'm stuck trying to write a sequel, how does this change the future? Besides the fact that I have no idea where to start up from, my fic just scrambled the whole Dragonlance storyline.

Elly Stromrage- YOU NEVER THOUGHT OF RAISTLIN/DALAMAR SLASH? I can't believe it. When I read Test of the Twins it smacked me upside the head, I found it so obvious. Oh well, more proof that my mind in terminally stuck in the gutter. Thank you for the great reviews.  
Yes, Raistlin does love, at least he did at this point in his life.

Dark Fairy of the Wood- I would rec "Into Focus" which is just brilliant and was a great inspiration, long, well written and very smutty smirk.

Dalamar Nightson- Thank you for reviewing every chapter and for the sequel suggestion. grin well, your namesake was the first Dragonlance character I read about, so I know his story backwards. I'm amazed you like this even though you say you hate Raistlin/Dalamar (which I can understand, there are some dreadful fics out there and I'm glad you think mine is not one of them.).

_Skull Bearer._


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